#what with all the robots around and autonomy themes

[skunkes]

whoo is the beautiful black guy oc with the star motif.... sawry i have not been around long enough

That is Cosmo (who I'm considering renaming to Cosme if not completely renaming to something else.) I lied about Wyatt being my only straight oc cause he's also transhet.... He is a prince and his parents are incredibly supportive of him in all aspects of his life EXCEPT they still want and expect him to enter a political marriage with a man to prevent a war, so he runs off into space.

Im actually not even sure if Vee is his actual love interest or if I just mashed them together crack ship style in the absence of any other plot at the time (I made them in high school.) but anyway he's on a spaceship with her, and those 2 children pictured in that same drawing I reblogged. Also his fursona is a horse/neopets peophin.

[dogcoyote]

Often when I'm feeling dogmode or any other kind of alterhuman way, I like to play video games as a way of self-expressing. Especially ones that let me play as something similar to [x creature] I feel like at that moment. Here are some I'd recommend to others, sorted into vague categories. Almost all of them will include some degree of character customization, as that's what I look for the most in games like this.

Canines:

WolfQuest: A simulation game where you live as a wolf, finding a mate and raising pups together. There's a learning curve, but it's so much fun to play. The devs really do a wonderful job of striking a balance between realism and enjoyable gameplay.

WolfHome (browser game): An MMO/chatroom that is very old and very dead, but I still like to hop in it and emote for funsies.

Reach of The River: You can play as a deer or a wolf.

Rabbits:

Bunhouse: A cute gardening game where you play as a rabbit that can walk on both two legs and four.

Deer:

The Deer God: A pixel game on Steam where you get to be a deer. Not super great, but I liked how relaxing it was.

The Endless Forest: A free indie game from the early 2000s where you play as a deer with a human face in an idyllic forest. No chat system, no identification beyond a pictogram if you choose to make an account. You can customize your deer with masks, pelts, and antlers, but you need the help of other players to do it!

Reach of the River: You can play as a deer or a wolf.

Birds:

Feather: A relaxing game where you play as a bird and fly around. Yes, that's it. Yes, it's beautiful.

Untitled Goose Game: It's a beautiful day, and you are a horrible goose.

Various real-world animals:

Meadow: A relaxing, no-combat, no-chat game where you can play as various mammals (and a few birds, and a frog!) including lynxes, foxes, goats/deer, rabbits, hedgehogs, pheasants...

The Shelter Series (including Paws): Badger (Shelter), Lynx (Shelter 2/Paws), Elephants (Shelter 3). Made by the same company that made Meadow.

Animalia Survival: An MMO survival game where you can play as a lion, zebra, wildebeest, hunting dog, and various other African animals. This one isn't as enjoyable as a game, it relies heavily on finding a good server that isn't toxic, but I still like prowling around as a lioness in it.

Dinosaurs and Reptiles:

Beasts of Bermuda: Like Animalia Survival, but with dinosaurs. Relies on finding a good server.

Lil Gator Game: You are a baby crocodile anthro running around in a world of other creatures.

Bugs and Aliens:

Empires of the Undergrowth: Ant life simulator. It's pretty good, but strategy-oriented.

Rain World: Slugcats are both slugs and cats. Somehow they feel more like aliens to me though.

Outer Wilds: You are an alien exploring space. This one has a beautiful story and is very immersive.

Drunk on Nectar: Various bugs, including jumping spider, mantis, and butterfly.

Robots:

Warframe: A free game that has a fantastic story once you get into it. Lots of shooting things in space, but you can swap between Warframes and customize your Warframe's colours etc.

The Talos Principle: A puzzle game with strong themes of religion, autonomy, personhood, etc. You are a robot.

Misc:

Book of Travels: If you kin any kind of human from older eras of humanity you might like this one. I can't explain it, but it brings me comfort when I'm feeling Paleolithic despite not being in that era at all.

Roblox: There are tons of games on Roblox that will allow you to play as all kinds of creatures, from realistic to fantasy. Warrior Cats Ultimate Edition, Feather Family, and Farm Life are ones I enjoy a lot. There are various dragon and dinosaur ones too, gryphons, unicorns, etc.

Furcadia: There are so many realms where you can be whatever you want. The community is very furry and alterhuman friendly. It can be quiet in the SFW areas but it's still absolutely worth checking out.

Illarion: You can play as various fantasy races. Roleplay is enforced, but I personally like it for wandering around as an orc or a lizardman or what have you.

Ancestors: The Humankind Odyssey: If you kin any kind of ape or prehistoric human, this one's for you!

Personally I really recommend checking out Roblox, there are SO many beautifully-made games with shockingly good graphics on there. Not just for therians either!

For humanoids, I also generally recommend games with fun character customization screens like Skyrim, Baldur's Gate 3, and Elden Ring, even if the gameplay itself doesn't bring me much euphoria.

Please feel free to add your own recommendations and thoughts!

[seoulfulbliss]

Park Jongseong (Part Two)

Author’s Note: The long-awaited part two! I worked so hard to bust this part out 😭, so it is a little long. I only intended for 3 parts and the third part has its own personality. I do also want to mention a potential trigger warning for some of you. This chapter does delve into themes of miscarriage and depression. Anything that is depicted could potentially be graphic for individuals who may have undergone that same duress. So, be forewarned. That being said, hope you enjoy babies 🫶🏾

(Friendly reminder, YOU DON’T HAVE PERMISSION TO COPY MY WORKS ANYWHERE.)

CEO! Jay x Estranged Wife! Black Reader 

Synopsis: A one-night stand with a handsome CEO leads to an unexpected derailment in your life plans. 

Content: Angst, talks of miscarriage, depictions of depression, bullying, neglect, pregnant reader, pregnancy kink, lactation kink, motherhood, smut, autistic child, ghosted friendships, misunderstandings, Jay’s mother reaaaalllllyyyy needs to get a life, eventual happy ending

Word Count: 11.5k

A life really can change in a whole week. One day you can be walking around with no knowledge of any duties or obligations outside of yourself, and the next, you could be staring down at two pink lines saying “congratulations, you’re having a baby.” 

And if that itself doesn’t taunt you enough, then the marriage license currently sitting in your hand might be a decent second option. If Jay was one thing, he was swift and efficient. Definitely a no bullshit type of guy. Maybe that efficiency is how you got pregnant. First times the charm evidently with potent sperm. 

Over the course of the last week, Jay handled everything for you. And by everything, understand that it meant absolutely everything regarding the rearrangement of your life.

You’re currently renting a spot and there’s no way you can get out of your lease? No problem, Jay can handle that for you. All it took was a phone call to the leasing office and it was terminated instantly. So there went your first excuse for why you shouldn’t move in. Then came the issue of furniture and moving your things. 

Well, you’re married to Jay. What could you possibly need this extra furniture for? Okay, you like the zebra print rug and the funky lamps with the pink base? Fine. You can bring that to his place and put it… somewhere safe (read: nowhere visible to Jay). Okay, why on earth would you need this couch? It served its purpose, just sell it. Oh, a relative gave it to you? Then give it back. Sigh. Okay fine, the movers can just put that in a storage unit. 

That’s exactly how the conversation went from start to finish. And each time, Jongseong found the perfect solution to your well-crafted problems. There went excuse number two. 

So then came excuse number three. Embarrassingly enough, you were not above throwing a tantrum in the tiny space of your apartment. There you sat, in the middle of your empty living room debating all the reasons why moving in would not be a great idea. Jay took to standing by the doorway a short distance from you. He had a slight air of annoyance about him that suggested he was itching to tape your mouth shut. With the way that you continued to ramble, his demeanor hinted that he honestly probably would. 

“But I don’t want to move. If I move, that means I lose autonomy over myself. As an independent woman, I take pride in never needing a man. Hell, my body already practically isn’t mine with the way it’s a container for your child. Now you’re asking me to share the same space? You’re already forcing me to take your last name!” 

Robotically, Jay just nods his head. Ohhhhh, so he’s not listening? Okay, time to up the ante. 

“Plus, how am I supposed to familiarize myself with a new environment when I’ve been living here for years? Come on. I’m a pregnant lady. Hormones are bound to start acting up any day. How would you be able to handle that? What if you piss me off so bad that I don’t want to see your face? Which is very possible with you, by the way. Besides, we hardly know each other. We’re not exactly the poster children for couples who can finish each other's sentences.” 

Jay just sighs. There is a response on the tip of his tongue. But you cut him off before he can utter it.

“And, I like the air here. It’s nice, fresh, and crisp. What if the air in your space isn’t suitable enough for the baby?” At this point, you’re totally just making anything up. The bigger the spectacle, the better. Maybe he’ll give in and leave this matter alone. 

“What if it’s full of pathogens and diseases, or nanoparticles that contribute to asthma? Would you take responsibil—”

Before you realize it, he is making his way across the room to you. Pulling you up by the arms, he makes direct eye contact. “Yes, I’ll take responsibility for all those things. You’re worried about the air? Let's get an air filter for all the rooms. Water is a concern? Okay, I’ll make sure we get an improved filtration system for all the faucets in the house. Hell, if you’re even worried about the thread count on the sheets, fine. Let’s buy more. Charge everything to my card.” 

Damn, so he’s a good lover in bed and husband material too? Then what the hell was up with his shitty attitude when you met him at the office? You were definitely undergoing a severe case of whiplash. First, he gives you an out of body experience during sex, then he’s brutally blunt over the technicalities of a business card, and now he’s aggressively caring in terms of the pregnancy. As much as you want to ride this ride again, the roller coaster is moving way too fast.

“You say that now, but what if you change your mind? I can be a hard woman to please—“

Smirk on his face, hands on your hips. “It didn’t seem that way the night we met.” And your mouth is snapping shut, because what the hell did he just say? 

“You…” his head tilts in amusement at your inability to find the right words. Oh, he thinks he’s cute, huh? You’ll show him cute alright. Finger pointed at his chest, this ought to give him a piece of your mind. 

“You can’t handle me, Jongseong. I come with a lot of particularities. The air filter is only the first of many requests. So you should—”

Then without any warning, Jay had you hoisted up over his shoulder, hand coming down harshly across your ass. A squeal of surprise stretches across the enclosed space of the room. “Did you just… spank me?” 

“Yes, because I don’t have time for this. We have a meeting with the registrar in…” he checks his watch, “an hour. And you’re too busy obsessing over the quality of air. Do you like wasting everyone’s time, or just mine?” 

He moves to the bathroom entrance. “Are you insane?!” You splutter as you hit at his back. “Who just slaps someone’s ass like that?”

By the way the next line of words fall from his mouth, you can tell he’s smirking. Smug little prick. “You didn’t have a problem with it back at XO hotel.” And you’re afraid Jongseong won’t make it to the courthouse with the way you contemplate strangling him. He sets you down by the bathroom sink before grabbing a pack of wipes. “Clean yourself up so we can leave. We’ll come back for the rest of your stuff another day.” 

Head hung metaphorically low, excuse number three was officially out the window.  

Fifty minutes later, you are across town at the courthouse watching the red ink of fate as the registrar stamps your freedom away. Congratulations to yourself, you suppose. So you were officially a taken woman on paper. Who cares? No biggie right? It’s just in theory, not practice. 

Except, oh. 

Jongseong bought rings, one for you and one for him. “It’s more convincing this way.” Who he was trying to convince, you had no idea. What you did know was the rock on your finger may be simple, but the price of it was anything but. Cushion cut diamond, with a dainty band. An ode to his personality once again; neat, simple, elegant. He definitely paid a pretty penny for this. 

That was something you noticed about him, his integrity. He lived up to his word. After that marriage certificate was signed off, he handed over one of his black cards. AmEx. Of course you knew he was loaded. But the casual way he said, “Use it for whatever you need.” Then positioning his hand behind the passenger seat as he reversed? Yeah, you nearly folded. His ex-fiancé had to be a strong woman to leave him. 

Living with Jay also proved to be…  interesting. His house was gorgeous. It sat on several acres of forested land. Foliage surrounded it like an accessory. If you analyzed it enough, you would think it was something out of a dark academia film. Much like his office, it too had the sleekness of mahogany paired with black and white accents. Except, you could tell where earth tones were prioritized to balance out the sharp monotony of its clinical aesthetic. Elegance topped with homely comfort. Jay really did have impeccable taste.

In his home, you had your own room. The reason being, him wanting to give you some semblance of personal freedom. You could respect him for it. There were still many things to figure out with your personal life. And you needed as much space as you could get to sort out your jumbled up career. Through the frenzy of discrimination, an unexpected pregnancy, and moving, you still hadn’t told your friends about your current situation either. You hadn’t been in the right headspace to do so. But you knew you needed the comfort and support that comes with friendship. So you planned to do so soon, before you started showing. Speaking of, apparently the thought of pregnancy was a thing Jay liked. 

Much like an onion, he had many layers about himself to peel back. But this was a layer you discovered through observation. Clearly, fatherhood was a desire for him. You could tell in the way he was concerned about your nutrition and comfortability. It meant a lot to watch him discuss your prenatal care with Dr. Paik. Especially in moments where you caught him in the early hours of the morning nursing a coffee while mulling over parenting books. Wanting to take care of people seemed to come naturally to him. 

He also happened to be laser focused on you. Primarily your body. You found him watching you occasionally in the space of his home. Whenever his schedule saw fit. If you were anywhere within his line of sight, his eyes were watching you. Like a hawk. 

You wanted to tiptoe to the kitchen for a late night snack? Surprise, Jay is still awake on the chaise lounge reading infographics in low light. And his eyes drink your legs in from the skimpy pajama shorts you wear. 

You wanted to make an early breakfast before he headed to work? Sure, do your thing. Just expect to be scared shitless by his silent form as he leans against the doorway watching you hum to yourself. 

There were even times when he came home late from long nights at the office. Those were… the more interesting days. If you were bent over the kitchen counter cleaning up the remnants of your dinner, then he was scooting past you like you were in a tight space in the otherwise openly spacious home. And best believe that when he brushed up against you, you were definitely feeling his dick print. 

And if you fall asleep on the couch late at night while doing research? He would come in, see you laying there so vulnerably and try everything in his power not to corrupt that image. But still, you felt him some of those nights. The way he would sidle up to the couch and watch you. You felt the featherlight touch of his hands on numerous occasions when he thought you were fully asleep. The way he would trail his finger lightly from your ankle up your thigh. And he would graze his fingers gently, in circles, around your inner thigh. Then he’d take a deep breath and remove them, like he was fighting to hold himself back. 

“It’s not healthy to sleep on the couch like this.” He’d whisper into your ear. And you would startle awake with a new level of hunger seeping into your skin.

Yes, these last few weeks of living with Jay were interesting. And the dangerous game he played sat as a reminder that you were in his domain. And you were every bit of the prey he believed you to be. 

Prime example being today. Jongseong sat at the kitchen table eating a yogurt bowl as he analyzed an ongoing project on his tablet. His work never really slept. 

“I read something interesting in a book recently.” He started out that morning. 

“Oh?” You hum in acknowledgment, stirring your cup of herbal tea on the counter. It had started getting harder for you to enjoy the scent of coffee. At 8 weeks, your body was really developing a dislike for certain foods and drinks with the way you got nauseous even looking at them. Your body had already begun to change to make way for motherhood. You were filling out. Your breasts becoming more sensitive and tender as they rounded out. Tea was the best gift you could provide yourself these days. You hadn’t quite started showing yet either. But there was a slight protrusion to your belly. Imperceptible to others, noticeable to you. 

“Pregnant women can start producing breast milk as early as 16 weeks.” You immediately still. That was not what you expected. And he was so casual with the way he said it too. Glancing back at him however, you can tell he is anything but. His eyes watch you intensely, like he’s just spilled a secret only meant for you two. A tiny smirk adorns his face. Goodness. He pushes his seat back as he makes his way over to your shocked frame. It’s like predator and prey the way his eyes hunt you down, keep you in place. Then he is standing behind you, practically flush against your back. Both his hands come to rest on either side of you on the counter. He was boxing you in. Then he leans down so his lips just barely touch your ear. 

“It’s called colostrum production. Then around the third trimester, the mommy’s breasts fully develop to provide milk for the baby. Sometimes,” he presses closer to you when he says this. “Mommy’s milk can leak all over her chest when she begins to lactate.” The way his husky voice travels through your ear to the pit of your stomach, if you weren’t already pregnant, you would’ve been by then. His hands slide off the counter to rest on your hips. You swear you’re no longer breathing, the way you feel his bulge against your ass. 

“I wonder what that would look like for you.” His eyes bore into your own mischievously. This is a dangerous game to be played, and Park Jongseong is winning. “Sounds like that’s your favorite fact about pregnancy.” You whisper breathlessly between you two. 

Smugness still lingers in his voice. “What can I say, I appreciate what a woman’s body can do.” And oh, you have to squeeze your legs together with the way his thumbs rub circles into your hips. Almost as if he can read your thoughts, he leans into you further. Breath fans your face, his nose brushing along your skin. “What’re you doing?” You whisper.

“Holding my wife. Is that a crime now?” He chuckles, far less innocently than he is trying to appear. Then he is leaning the rest of the way into your space. Just as his lips brush against yours, his phone rings. The ringtone startles you, breaking the spell. Now sober to your thoughts, you realize Jay is no longer toeing the line of this game. Groaning, he drops his head to your shoulder before reluctantly pulling away. You clear your throat awkwardly and sip your tea, gazing at him as he answers the phone.

“Hello?” Judging by the tenseness of his shoulders, he is less than pleased at the news he receives.

“Secretary Kim, please confirm that what you are saying is true. Is my mother currently on her way up to my office?” Deep sigh, “Okay, I’m on my way.” He hangs up. 

“Everything alright?” You inquire. He had mentioned his mother, and you had yet to meet her. Jay hardly ever brought her up since you moved in. So, curiously, you were eager to meet the woman who raised him. 

Distractedly, Jay nods his head. “Business to take care of.” Then he is off gathering his work necessities before heading out the door. In that moment, you had naively believed in those several minutes of peace that your pregnancy would go smoothly. Boy were you about to be wrong; on many fronts. 

What you didn’t expect was the brewing storm that came along with his mother. Park Eun-ju. Well… the devil certainly does wear Prada. Everything went downhill from there. 

You met her the same day Jay had cornered you in the kitchen. It was late afternoon when she charged into your shared home with her son. She came in blazing like she was the bull and you the matador. You had sat on the living room couch going over the proper procedures to file a discrimination complaint when she appeared. The fast paced click clack of heels on the marble floor being the only warning you got before she stepped her Prada clad shoes past the threshold to the living room. There stood Park Eun-ju in all her glory, decked out in a white pantsuit with red heels. Immediately, her presence filled up the space. She certainly was intimidating.

“So this is the girl.” Disdain dripped like poison in her words. Oh. Immediately, you stood at attention just as Jay rounded the corner.

“Mother—”

“Mrs. Park—”

She raised her hand to cut you both off. “I didn’t ask you to stand. Sit down.” And you damn sure did.

“Mom.” Jay tries again, stepping forward to touch her shoulder.

“Jongseong, why on earth am I just now finding out you filed for a marriage license a month ago? And why am I also just finding out that the girl is pregnant?” She hisses.

“I planned on telling you eventually.”

“Is it yours?” Her gaze left yours long enough to glance at her son in distaste. Okay, what the hell was her problem? What was she being so judgmental for? 

“Yes.”

“How can you be so sure? Have you confirmed? She’s a random woman off the streets. For all you know, she could be lying to you. How can we be certain?” That really ruffled your feathers. What did she mean ‘random woman’ and ‘off the streets?’ She was characterizing you as some broad who jumped from one hook up to the next. 

Cutting in, you make your presence known again. “Excuse me?”

“Mother, please.” Jongseong pleads.

“I’m just expressing concern. Have you thought about the circumstances?” She ignores you in favor of speaking to her son.

“I don’t appreciate the way you’re speaking regarding my character when you know nothing about me.” you state heatedly.

Jay turns to give you an exasperated look.

“And I don’t appreciate you whoring yourself out for my son's wealth.” She quips back acidicly. Your jaw is on the floor. Appalled, you turn to Jay hoping he will say something. There was no way he would let her speak that way about you, right? 

Wrong. 

Jay ushers his mother to take a seat in the chaise lounge chair before he is kneeling on the floor in front of her. Trying to placate her, he grasps her hands in his as he stares up at her.

“Mom, you always taught me to be responsible right? I’m trying to do the right thing. She’s 8 weeks along. The time frame lines up with the night we met and…” He trails off, glancing at you briefly. “You know how I've felt since Da-eun left. I hate breaking commitments, so I decided to marry her to spare us both the embarrassment of bearing children out of wedlock. Especially since the Park name now has a certain status to it.” Eun-ju hums off-handedly. “We’re in this together. That’s just something you’ll have to deal with. Besides, you’ll be a grandmother—”  She cuts him off again.

“I don’t approve.” The entire time Jay spent monologuing, you were stiff. Now, even moreso since his mother bluntly stated she would not be in support of what already was. “Jongseong, the Park name is now a household one. And out of all the women you could choose, you chose one beneath your caliber.”

You scoff in disbelief at her shady behavior. “What about the profiles of the women I gave you after Da-eun? Did you even look at them? Why not consider them instead of…” She trails off as she looks at you. Okay, you’ve had enough.

“What is your issue lady? Jay already explained the situation to you, and while the circumstances surrounding it are a little unorthodox, we’re still bringing a child into this world. You don’t have to like it, but you damn sure don’t have to bitch about it.”

“Hey.” Jay warns. His mother titters. 

“This is what I mean Jongseong, no class. She isn’t a woman I would've picked for you in a million years.” You bristle at that. The lady was itching for a fight.

“I can make my own decisions, mother. What’s done is done. It’s final. We’re married and we’re having this child. End of discussion.” A wave of silence stretches about for several moments before she speaks again. 

“Fine. If you’re so dead set on making your own decisions, then I’ll make this one for myself. I’ll be residing here throughout the entire term of her pregnancy.”

“What?” You and Jay both exclaim.

“Well it's only fair, right? If I’m the grandmother to be, then shouldn’t I be around to get to know your bride? I fear we’re not off to a very great start.” Ohhhhh the heifer was goading you. 

“Whose fault would that be.” You muttered through clenched teeth.

“Y/N.” Jay regards you with a stern look. His mother smirks over his shoulder. Oh god, this was going to be a long pregnancy. Gathering your things, you trudge back to your room to escape the mother-son duo. 

That’s how you found yourself tired and drained by week 10. The reality of it all was finally catching up to you. If living with Jay was interesting, then living with his mother was hell. In the short time she had been there, you learned just how much of a ‘boy mom’ she could be and how much of a momma’s boy he could be. That electrifying moment in the kitchen with Jay never occurred again. There wasn't an opportunity for it to. Unlike before, when you both freely danced around each other, now moments between you two were terse and tense. Heavily weighed down by the presence of his mother. She was literally everywhere. breathing down your neck. Nagging. 

When you cooked a meal, she would criticize the way you did it. If you didn’t clean up enough around the house, she would give you an earful about it. “You should learn how to be a proper housewife.” She would say, as if you didn't aspire for more. She would also make slick comments when Jay wasn’t around. Telling you to monitor what you eat lest you blow up like a house. For crying out loud, you were pregnant and she was demanding so much from you. 

When she accompanied you both to prenatal appointments, she always had to add her two cents. As if all mothers experience pregnancy the same. If you had a concern about something, she would giggle under her breath like you were stupid. While you may not have been pregnant before, you still weren’t daft to your representation in the world. You knew the mortality rate among black women in childbirth compared to their counterparts. You wanted to make sure your body was healthy for you and the baby. Jay did too. In this regard, you both moved like a unit, doing your best to support the future to come. You may not have wanted to be a mother, but you certainly wanted to give Jay this. It warmed your heart the way his eyes would light up at the prospect of fatherhood. You just wished he would stand up to his mother more. Especially when she infantilized him. 

She was constantly droning on about what motherhood meant to her. And she made sure to let you know that Jay was more her son than your husband by making you feel insecure about what little you did know about him. 

“He doesn’t like his clothes washed with this detergent. He has sensitive skin.”

“He doesn’t want his food touching. It’s a texture issue.” 

“Why aren’t you ironing his clothes for work? Do you really consider yourself a wife?” 

Blah, blah, blah. She was stressing you the fuck out. She did everything in her power to push you away, and nearly succeeded at it. One incident in particular nearly made you call it quits. Minding your business was an art form for you, but that all went out the window when this meddlesome woman kept picking at you behind her son’s back. You were sitting on the living room sofa wondering why you hadn’t received information back about the complaint you filed when she waltzed in wearing her favorite brand. Prada.

She took a seat in the chaise lounge analyzing you. Already antsy from a lack of response from the state board, you knew you were a ticking time bomb. And she was getting ready to light the fuse. “You know, I don't know what my son sees in you.” Chuckling smugly, she crosses her legs. “His humanitarian spirit seems to follow him everywhere. Maybe that's why he has such bad luck with women.” Your brows furrow as your eyes dart in the direction of the hallway leading to the bedrooms. Jay said he was taking a shower when he first walked in. That's why she felt so emboldened to brandish her dislike outwardly. 

“He always did feel the need to help strays.” The evil witch was full on smirking. No longer trying to mask her hatred.

“The only reason I am refraining from calling you out of your name is due to the little respect I have for your son. My advice to you would be to leave me alone. Before you poke a bear that will not fall back asleep.” 

She waves your words away. “I’m not worried about your empty threats. I’m worried about your character. Your motive. I don’t trust you.”

Squinting at her, you give her your undivided attention. “In the time you have been here, I have done nothing to give you the impression that I wasn't a decent human being.” 

“What you consider decent isn’t the same for me. Why won’t you just admit you’re using my son for his money?” The way you wanted to throttle her was scarily real. You’ve never had someone disrespect you so blatantly before. Not even the dick who denied you your license was this bold.

“Not once have I entertained the thought of using Jay for his money. I didn’t want this marriage and I certainly didn't want to move in. He sprung it all on me. My parental rights were going to be signed away to him the moment the baby was here.”

“Yet you spend the money on his black card freely. With that ring on your finger, you must have an expensive taste.” It’s crazy the way she makes your eye twitch.

“Because he wanted it this way. He practically twisted my arm just to agree with him.”

“You could have refused.” Eun-ju rebuts.

“I’m starting to think this conversation is more about you hating me than anything else.” You observe.

“I don’t want just anybody having access to his finances and success.”

“What are you really trying to say?” You spit out.

“Are you a gold digger?”

“Excuse me?” How many times can this woman surprise you with her rhetoric? 

“Well, I’ve seen plenty of girls like you. Only in it for the money. Trying to tie a man down by having his child. What do you ladies call it? A baby daddy?” Your jaw has practically unhinged, the way it is on the floor. She giggles. 

“It’s hilarious really. The lengths a person would go for some cash. I asked around about you, and heard you were without a job. Something about failing to obtain a license? So what, you’ve decided to come and mooch off my son?” 

Your lip trembles at the accusation. “How dare you discredit my hard work—” 

“Is it money you need? I can write you a check right now.” It is insulting how her accusations carry the weight of your failure. She digs into her purse to retrieve what she needs to write you a check. 

“How much do you need?” She dabs the tip of her pen onto her tongue before opening the checkbook. Immediately, you slap it out of her hand. The items clatter to the floor as she gasps out loud. It is just your luck that Jay comes back from showering. 

Misinterpreting the previous events, he storms over to you in anger. Grabbing your wrist, he drags you away from his mother. “What do you think you’re doing?!” He yells. You indicate to his mother who is clutching her pearls in disbelief. 

“Did you not just hear the awful things she said to me?” His grip on your wrist tightens. “I don’t give a damn about petty squabbles. That is my mother. You don’t raise your voice at her in this house and you certainly don't attack her.” Tears threaten to spill from your eyes. So that was her objective, get him to gang up on you. Okay, fine. 

“Are you going to give her the same speech?” The grip becomes impossibly tighter, you wince. 

‘This isn’t a group discussion.” His mother giggles with mirth. “Where on earth did you find this woman, Jongseong? What horrible manners.” 

“Mother.” He warns. You whimper at the hold he has on your wrist. 

“Let go. It hurts.” You whisper. He drops your hand like it burns him. 

“Don’t argue with her again.” That night, a bigger rift is wedged between you and Jay. You take to avoiding him the next few days. Although it is misplaced, it is obvious he is mad at you. So you just stay out of his way. 

In your isolation, you are finally prompted to tell your friends about your predicament. Jalissa, Maci, and Dreux, all sit in various states of shock on the other line. “Wait, back up. You’re practically 11 weeks pregnant and you're just now telling us?” Dreux.

“Bitch, is that why you’ve been avoiding us?” Jalissa.

“Was it that guy you met at the bar?” Maci.

“I’m sorry I’m just now mentioning it. Between finding out and the stress of marriage and moving, it just slipped my mind.”

“Marriage?!”

“Moving?” Maci and Dreux shout at the same time.

“Girl, what the fuck is going on?” Jalissa again. So you explain in depth meeting Jay at the club, the night you had, finding out you're pregnant, the marriage certificate, moving in, and the predicament with his mother. 

“Damn. you know those boy moms don’t play about their sons.” Dreux mumbles tiredly. It is clear she is frustrated by the overall situation and your lack of notifying them. “I just wish you had trusted us with this information when you first found out. We could’ve figured this out together.”

Jalissa rolls her eyes playfully, “But then she wouldn’t be staying with a super rich, super hot guy. Sounds like he’s gonna be financing hot girl summer when Y/N recovers.” Maci giggles along with her.

“No, Jalissa. We’re not doing that.”

“Why not?” She pouts. 

“Because I respect him and what we have. I would never use him like that.”

Dreux hums in a way that lets you know she’s preparing for a debate. She always did love to prove a point. “You respect him even through all the bullshit his mother is putting you through?”

“He’s good to me.”

“Yet he still lets her talk to you any kind of way. Sounds hypocritical to me.” Silence resonates through the phone. Maci chews her lip nervously at the tense atmosphere. Jalissa makes a motion with her hand as if to say, “clock it.”

“You know, you always did get stuck in these fantasies instead of living in reality.” You recoil in bewilderment. What the hell did she mean by that? Dreux continues.

“I need you to be serious. He is a rich, Asian man in circles you couldn’t even dream of standing in. His mother already treats you like shit, and you decide to have his baby anyway? What makes you think they would accept you? As a black woman, you have to be realistic about these things. Especially when you’re giving him a black baby. Do you think those snobby people would accept it?” She states.

You scoff. “It’s 2025. It’s not that serious.” Even as you say it, you feel doubt creeping in your gut. You know the stipulations Korean culture has surrounding their first born sons. As an only child, Jay’s circumstance regarding you is a bit unconventional traditionally. 

Jalissa cackles. “Nah girl, I've seen Crazy Rich Asians. They don’t play about their rich men. Especially their sons.”

“This is why you should’ve come to us.” Dreux again.

“Maybe I didn’t want you to lecture me.”

“Maybe you need it.”

“Where is this coming from?” 

“I just think it’s funny how you encouraged me to get an abortion in college over minor things when you’re out here living lavishly, posted up in a mansion with a rich man's baby on the way. Ah… but I guess babies are only important when you have a sugar daddy to provide for you, right?”

Maci gasps as Dreux breaches the topic that really bothers her.

“Dreux.” 

You and Dreux go way back, longer than you had been friends with Jalissa and Maci. You were friends in high school and went to college together. Your freshman year was wild. Dreux practically had to babysit you as she was the oldest. You were also a lot more impulsive back in those days. You begged her to go to a party she didn’t want to attend. That’s how she met Donovan. Messing around with him, she got pregnant that same year. Initially, she wanted to keep it. But in good faith, you had to realistically lay out her options for her. She was a struggling college student in her freshman year who had to take out loans just to enroll. She couldn’t take care of a baby. Especially with Donovan putting his hands on her. You couldn’t let her do that to herself. It wasn't over minor things. So, you slid an abortion pamphlet her way, and the rest was history. You thought Dreux had been fine with it as time went on. But evidently, she still harbored some resentment for it. 

“Uhhhh. Y’all wanna fill us in?” Jalissa smacks her gum.

“She knows what I’m talking about.” Dreux hisses.

“You know I was just protecting you.” 

“Personally, I think you just didn’t want me to have it. You didn’t want to have to compete with a baby. You always did like all the attention.” The accusation stings. Dreux did have to take care of you a lot more than you would care to admit during those times. But you wouldn’t selfishly suggest an abortion to her because of that. 

“That’s not true and you know it. That guy was hitting you, and you didn’t have the financial support to provide for the child anyway. I was doing what was best for you.”

“Load of good that did. You don’t even know what’s best for yourself.” She snarks back.

Uncomfortable, Maci tries to interject. “Uhhh, guys?”

Honestly, you’re too fed up to care what Maci has to say. You have been battling with bullshit for the past several weeks, and the moment you come to your friends for support, this is the nonsense they hit you with? You were already on a short fuse from how mother witch wound you up. Now, the fuse was even smaller. 

“Well, you know what I think Dreux? I think this all stems from a place of jealousy. You think I purposefully didn't tell you because deep down, you have this belief I don't trust you to be happy for me. Honestly, from where I’m sitting, it doesn’t seem like you are. I know you always wanted to be a mother, but don’t take your previous decisions out on me. You could’ve said no, and we would’ve figured it out together.”

As mature as Dreux is, you can tell that she knows you’re right. Which is another thing she hates. Being wrong. She stares at you angrily before spitting the words, “Fuck you” at the screen and dropping from the call. You let out a shaky breath. That came from left field.

“Now why would you say that to her?” Jalissa frowns.

“She literally came at me first.” You splutter.

“But it was clearly something she was still sensitive about.” Maci chews at her lip again.

“How did this conversation turn into lecturing me?” 

“Maybe when you started making crazy decisions.”

“Jalissa, you are the last person to critique any decision making.” You snap.

“Oop,” Jalissa holds her hand to the screen. “Don’t start with me. You already pissed one of us off and I’m very close to getting there too.” 

The attitude in the air is astounding to you. You don’t know how this conversation derailed into a train wreck. Now you had to deal with your friends being frustrated with you too?

Maci interjects successfully this time. “Maybe we should just table it for now. Then pick back up another time.” 

“Good idea. Call me when you get the stick out of your ass.” Jalissa flips you off as she hangs up. Maci smiles awkwardly, then drops from the call too. All you are left with is a black screen. 

For the first time throughout this whole debacle, you feel yourself begin to cry. So many obstacles were hitting you left and right. You truly didn’t expect to feel abandoned like this by your friends. You understand where Dreux’s disappointment and frustration stemmed from, but why couldn’t anyone be happy for you? 

Week 11 was tricky for you. Your friends weren’t answering any of your texts or calls. You tried your hardest to apologize to Dreux, but she wouldn’t even respond. And Jalissa wouldn’t accept your apology until Dreux did. Maci didn’t have a backbone to save her life. So, she went with the majority. That left you dealing with the strained atmosphere of the house alone. Jay was back speaking to you, but most of his responses were clipped. They were hardly conversational. What frustrated you was the fact that he still took care of you though, making sure you were taking your prenatal vitamins and eating proper meals. For the most part, his mother didn’t say much to you again. Feeling like she got the upper hand. She would huff and puff occasionally, but most of what she had to say was whispered out of her son’s earshot. You just ignored her.  

The hormones didn’t make it any better either. You knew pregnancy could present itself differently for most women. But you didn’t know it would be like this. It started out small. Just little aches in your lower back. They ranged from 30 minutes to an hour. On and off. Then came the uncomfortability in your abdominal area. At first, you could handle it. But as the days progressed, the slight pinch started to feel like heavy cramps. But this was temporary. When the aching would stop, you would simply go about your business. Chalking it up to stress, you did your best to take it easy. 

You had no idea what was to come. 

When that letter came in the mail, it really was imminent that a trainwreck was bound to occur.  You had received a response back regarding the complaint you filed. Request to pursue this formally was denied. Denied. You could only chuckle humorlessly at your luck. They wouldn’t accept your fucking request, citing that the issues had been on your end and not the board. If you want to apply for licensure again, then you need to comply with their rules. Which was frustrating, because you had. But in this moment, you could only feel defeat. There was no more fight left in you. With one situation piling up after the other, you finally hit your breaking point. 

And just when week 12 hits, nearing the end of that third month, stress finally catches up with you.

You hadn’t really understood the signs when it happened. All you know is that you woke up from your nap that day alone. Jay was at work and his mother was out. The pain had started out low, then intensified excruciatingly. It was the worst abdominal pain you had ever felt. Worse than period cramps. The pain practically immobilized you, the way you could hardly move. But somehow, you made your way to the bathroom. You didn’t get far before you collapsed onto the floor. You knew immediately that something was wrong. You writhed in pain for what seemed like hours, when you felt it. The gush of something warm and wet between your legs. Pulling yourself up to lean against the tub, you see it. A puddle of blood forming beneath you. 

“No.” You whisper brokenly. The trainwreck was already knocking at your door. 

You sat in pain with the knowledge that your body was failing you. That’s how Jay found you two hours later after coming home for a late lunch. Calling out to you, your whimpers lead him to the bathroom. There you sat, in tears as blood coats your lower body and hands. It looked like a murder scene. Horrified, Jay rushes out to call Dr. Paik as you sobbed quietly on the bathroom floor.  

Carrying a child was an interesting phenomenon. The body adapts to make way for motherhood, shifting parts of your body to sustain a child. Evidently, pregnancy can shift other organs too. Like a heart. Make those overwhelmed at the idea of carrying a child excited with the prospect of eventually holding them. That’s what it did to you. But your body… your body had given up somewhere. Threw in the proverbial towel that misery picked up. 

Miscarriage. They happen primarily in the early stages of pregnancy. You were still within that window. Marginally. There was no baby. 

In that moment, it felt like you were floating. Barely hanging onto this thread called life. Everything dulled to grey, like your perception of color had muted into the background of a rainy day. Attachment settled on you easily. You hadn't known this was something motherhood could provide. But there you were, laying in a care facility staring, but not seeing. Mind elsewhere. You felt empty. You were. 

You’re not sure when you began looking forward to the concept of bringing life into the world. Maybe it was because of the way Jay cared for you. Maybe it was the raw vulnerability in his face when he discussed the idea of building a family. Maybe it was the excited look on his face when he talked about information he had learned in those parenting books. Maybe it was the thought of eventually feeling your child’s first kicks. Maybe it was simply the thought that you and Jay had created a life. But you were disappointed that your body couldn’t follow through with it. Honestly, you felt that Jay was too. 

He never said much about it, didn’t push it. But in ways he used to hover before, he had stepped back. The first few days after, you hardly saw him. He had things to handle. Work never stopped. Which saddened you. The both of you just lost a baby. Shouldn’t he be here grieving with you? You sat at home, the weight of failure looming over you. You felt less than a woman. Ashamed of what your body could not do. And Jay… just worked. Leaving you to drown in that guilt alone.

With Jay absent, you were left in the house to deal with his mother by yourself. However, you avoided her like the plague. You stayed holed up in your room. Didn’t want to eat and could hardly even sleep. She still found ways to antagonize you. 

The straw that broke the camel’s back was the last thing she said to you before you snapped. “Even your body can’t work properly to give my son a child. How could you possibly hold the Park name?” After that, you aren’t sure what happened. All you know is, you blacked out. 

And when you came to, Jay was holding your thrashing body while Eun-ju screamed in horror. She was clutching her neck, it being an angry red. The pearl necklace she had been wearing laid scattered on the floor. You had tried to choke her. She deserved it. 

After that, Jay sent his mother away. He paid more attention to you then. Not necessarily physically, but your mental care. Dr. Paik recommended some mental health clinics to him. Said it might be helpful in situations like yours. Depression from losing a baby. They had both noticed you weren’t taking care of yourself too. So, Jay hired a caretaker to cook and clean after you for a few months. Someone who would make sure you took your vitamins, walked around the house, and stretched your legs. 

Her name was Ok Young-Ja. An older woman in her early sixties. She took care of you in ways that Jay couldn’t, ways he knew he couldn’t. Some days when it felt too much, she would get you out of bed and run a bath for you. Soaking in the warm water, she would entertain you, humming old trot songs occasionally. Then you would say, “Tell me your story.” And she would. 

Throughout that time, Young-Ja was a silent force keeping you steady. Truly, it felt like she was a lifeline, your support in a dark place. 

You hadn’t spoken to your friends much since the incident. They were heavily on social media living their best life. They didn’t seem interested in reconciliation the way you had been. Instead, trying to force you to come back and grovel. In your current state of mind, you didn’t need it. There was no meeting them halfway. So you left them at their destination and kept searching for your own. 

That had been hard too. But as days turned to months, you realized that you deserved more than what life had tried to take from you. 

So, you decided to get better. Not just for yourself, but because you felt like you owed it to your baby to no longer feel at fault for what couldn’t be. 

It started out slow. You would get up and help Young-Ja with little things around the house. She would fuss, telling you to take it easy. But you wanted to do this. It took your mind off things. Besides, spending time with Young-Ja had been the brightest part of your life in the few short months she cared for you. Then you started helping her with groceries. It felt good to smell fresh air, to feel the humidity on your skin. Young-Ja was happy for you too. You could tell by the way the creases near her eyes dipped in just a bit further at the stretch of her smile. She would pat you on the back like you were her baby, gushing about how good you were doing. 

Then the time came for her to depart. Six and half months after being married to Jay, three and half since you miscarried. You knew Young-Ja had done all she could do for you. She did too. Patting your back as she held you, it was too easy to cry. Jay had been there to send her off. He thanked her and paid her probably way more than they agreed upon. And she was off on her next journey. 

Hollowness ate at your heart those first few days. Jay hovered, almost as if afraid you would revert back to that catatonic state. But you grew stronger by the day. This was only a temporary sadness. Still, you laid in bed most nights wishing he held you. You felt him do so once, when he thought you were sleeping. Apparently, he only liked to let his inhibitions loose when he was sure he wouldn’t be embarrassed for it. That night, he had cried laying in the bed embracing you from behind. Silent sobs wracked his body as he cried into your shoulder. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” Muffled gasps whispered into the night. You let him, pretending to be asleep. 

Everyone grieves differently. After that, it didn’t happen again. Still, you pressed on in your quest for healing. 

Keeping busy with house chores, you became obsessed with routine. Like clockwork, you would get up, cook for Jay, send him to work, clean whatever you could, and prepare dinner. It was monotonous, becoming boring over time. Especially on the nights when Jay came home late. Those were the nights he wouldn’t eat, deep in the throes of building out a new project. 

In his frustration, he would brush you off, sheltering in his office space. That door stayed closed often, as if you and he were separated by two entirely different worlds. But you were, weren’t you? And his mother still did well to remind you.

Another long night for Jay had turned into another lonely night for you. You were doing your best to take care of things and stay upbeat despite the previous months of pain. You wanted to care for Jay, longed to befriend him in ways you hadn’t truly been half a year ago. He was your husband. You wanted to know every detail about his personal life. But even if she no longer set foot in the house again, his mother found ways to remind you that you both were not the same. 

It didn’t take much to hear the heated conversation spilling beyond the door of Jay’s office. Though muffled, it was easy to pick up on his mother’s complaints. “Staying with her isn’t an obligation! There are plenty of other women out there suitable for you.” 

“Mother,” Jongseong sighs into the receiver. “You know why I married her.”

“And she lost the baby, Jongseong. Don’t you want to be happy? With a real family. Can she even provide that for you?” He is silent for some time.

“Just… think about it, alright? Look over those dating profiles I sent you.” Backing away from the door, you reclaim your spot in the kitchen. Jay looks haggard when he comes out of the office. You are cleaning up the dinner he didn’t eat. “You’re still awake?” He questions.

“Yeah.” You mumble dejectedly. Hearing that conversation, you became hyper aware of the insecurities surrounding your body. It hurt to hear his mother question the validity of your womanhood. It hurt even more so that Jay did not disagree. He hums, observing you. “Don’t stay up too late.” You were from different worlds. Maybe Dreux was right.

After that, you took to only focusing on yourself. Your conversations with Jay went nowhere unless he personally started a conversation with you. He just let you be, chalking it up to the lingering effects of depression. What he didn’t realize was that you were pulling away.

Saturday morning found you out at the local park. You took to jogging recently, finding new hobbies to preoccupy yourself. Running made you feel good, helped clear your head when it was too cluttered. That’s why you built it into your routine. You were running the same route, when fate began to align. 

It was coincidental, the way this giant dog came barreling into you. His leash had flapped in the wind as he plopped himself onto you. There you sat, on the ground, a giant pile of fur in your arms. Annnnnd he was licking your face. Giggling, you push him away. “Down boy.” You laugh. 

“Sully!”

“Omg, we’re so sorry.” Two feminine voices rang out at the same time. Two women dressed in walking gear rush forward. 

“I don’t know what’s gotten into him! He really likes people, but he’s never acted like this.” Yellow windbreaker with the turquoise hair apologizes. 

The brunette with the long hair bows at you. “We sincerely apologize. We're dog sitting for a neighbor, and this stubborn guy decided it was a great time to yank his leash away.” She helps you stand up.

Dusting yourself off, you observe them. They seem really sheepish about the turn of events. The shorter colorful one red in the face with embarrassment. The taller one bowing once again. That’s how you meet them, Hyori and Mei. A Korean and Japanese woman respectively. A gay couple. You picked up on it by the way they held hands. It was cute. The rest was history.

By the tenth month of your marriage to Jay, you found yourself well-integrated into the couple’s lives. After that incident in the park, you would see each other often. And Hyori, feeling bad about the previous events, took the initiative to invite you for coffee as an apology. Their treat. Since then, you three were practically attached at the hip. 

Jay was super busy most nights. So, you didn’t think he would notice the days you stayed out late. 

Delighted to have new friends, you spent as much time as you could with them. They pulled you further into a lighter headspace. One night in their flat, over a few drinks, you tell them your story. Tears had been shed, with both women comforting you. Out of all your failures recently, this was an accomplishment you could be proud of. You had made genuine connections in your adult age. That was no small feat. Most people stress the complexity of finding people to befriend in their adult age. Some citing horror stories. But these two? Their generosity made it easy to settle in your friendship.

Nothing could pull you from the cloud you were on. Not even Jay. Or so you thought. He had come home one night, his secretary in tow. Kim Yeonmi. You remembered the name, but had never met her. She was pretty, tall in a modelesque sort of way. Her hair was pulled back into a bun. Broad shoulders suited her slim frame. 

“Um, hi.” You mumble in surprise. She just nods her head, not opening her mouth to speak. Rude. You direct your attention to Jay. He scratches his neck awkwardly. “What’s going on?”

Yeonmi cuts Jay off before he can speak. “There’s a gala we have to attend for one of Park Enterprises' business partners. Jay invited me as his date and thought it a good idea for me to get dressed here so we can arrive on time.” She wraps her arm around his. Oh. 

“A date.” You hum. 

The intensity of Jay’s stare bores into you. He asks Yeonmi to go get ready before turning to you. The click clack of her heels sashaying across the floor fills the empty space for several moments before he speaks. Hands in his pockets, “It’s an annual event. For several years, Yeonmi has gone with me. I would’ve invited you but… I didn’t know your plans. You’ve been out a lot recently.” The last part sounds like an accusation if you focus on it too much. So instead, you hear his statement for what it is.

“Okay, Jay.” 

He furrows his brows, “Okay?”

You shrug your shoulders. “If that’s all it is, there’s no need for an explanation right? It’s not like there’s anything else going on… is there?” 

Immediately, he denies. “No,” he said that with conviction. Must be true. 

“Then we’re fine.” And you had meant it. But you became increasingly frustrated as the night went on. Furious that he had another woman in your house together. Getting ready for an event, just to be draped across his arm like eye candy. Yeah, you were pissed. Little did you know though, the night was only just beginning for you. 

This proved to be true, when hours later, Jay stumbles into the house quite tipsy. “Jay?” You called out as you heard sluggish footsteps down the hall. Making your way to the living room, you find Jay leaning against the wall tugging off his tie. His eyes find yours in the open space. 

“Wow,” He drawls. “Look who's actually home tonight.”

You scoff at the words tumbling from his mouth. 

“Are you drunk?”

“Didn’t have a hot date lined up?” He asks, completely ignoring your statement. Who was he to question you? 

“Didn’t you?” You reply back. He tilts his head back in amusement. “The only woman I want on my arm is the one standing in this room.” A smirk forms on his face. You can see the hunger in his eyes underneath the lowlights of the living room.

“That’s too bad. She didn’t get an invite.” He stalks over to you, eyes drinking in your half naked form. You were only in a long shirt and panties. You didn’t have it in you to be self-conscious when you first left your room. But the way his eyes took you apart, you were beginning to feel the effect.

“Would you have come if I begged?”

“I would’ve done a lot of things if you begged me.” By now, he is standing in front of you. The first three buttons of his dress shirt unbuttoned successfully. His hands come to rest upon your waist. The smell of him is intoxicating. The room is heavy with a sensual atmosphere. You both were teetering back on the edge of that dangerous game.

“Yeah? Say it again.” He commands with a whisper. You shudder at the attention of his gaze. He presses you into the wall behind you. “You like it when I beg? Tell me again.” His lips graze your jawline. How you got in this predicament so quickly? You hardly know. But what you do know is this, Jay’s actions are being controlled by his alcohol consumption. Clearing your mind, you push him lightly. 

“You're drunk, Jay. Let me get you some water.” What you don’t expect is for him to corner you at the sink as you get him a glass. He cages you in. Hot breath fans your ear as he says, “Will you let me touch you if I beg?”

“Jay—” You start.

“Please.” The brokenness of his whisper drowns out any other noise. Including your rational thinking. 

The tightrope you both were barely balancing on snaps. 

Throwing all caution to the wind, you set the glass aside and pull him into a searing kiss. He groans into your mouth, finally getting to have a taste after so long. His hands grip the flesh of your cheeks as he grinds against you. His lips taste of tangerine whiskey sour. Your favorite drinks respectively. 

“Jay.” You whisper against his lips. He hoists you up on the counter, standing between your legs. Pulling away, he stares dazedly at your face. “I fought so hard against this carnal need. Do you have any idea what you do to me? Those nights I found you lying on the couch, I wanted to mount you and bulldoze you on every surface. Like a bunch of rabid animals. That’s how I wanted to fuck you.” 

Whimpers spill from your lips as you try to clench your legs shut. “Uh uh,” Jay lightly slaps your thighs. “Keep these open for me. Yeah?” You nod your head dumbly. 

“Good girl.” He whispers against your lips. 

Then he’s pulling back to stare at your cunt. Your pussy is already wet with anticipation. A wet patch forms on your underwear. Jay groans when he sees it. 

“So wet already. All this for me?” 

“Yes.” You whine. 

Biting his lip, he chuckles before leaning back in to kiss you. The kiss is messy with desire. You both nip at each other’s lips, battling for dominance. Jay’s fingers trail down to your clothed pussy. He rubs circles over your clit. You swallow a moan deep in your throat. 

“You like that baby?” His fingers work desperately over that sweet spot. 

“Yeees,” you’re practically sobbing. He smirks. Then he’s pulling your panties aside and shoving his ring and middle fingers in you. Gasping, you tilt your head back as he sucks marks into your neck. The wet squelching of him finger fucking you echoes through kitchen.

“So fucking messy.” He sticks his tongue into your ear. 

“Oh, God.” You cry out. Just as the band in your abdomen is about to snap, he stops. 

You huff in frustration. “Why’d you stop?”

“Because I’m starving. Don’t you want to let me have this pussy for dessert?” That was the fairest warning he could give before he was on his knees. Pulling your panties down in one go, he devours your pussy on the kitchen floor. You hold on to the counter as he eats you out like a dying man. 

Your toes curl at the pleasure his tongue gives. His eyes brand your soul as he laps at your clit messily. He groans into your cunt when you pull his hair. It doesn’t take long from that point for your orgasm to creep upon you. With a high pitched keen in the back of your throat, you cum all over his face. 

He continues to bury his face in your pussy as he works you through it. Lapping up the rest of your juices, he pulls back. He gives you a cheeky smile, lower half of his face wet with your fluid. 

“Let me make love to you.” And he does. He takes you apart on the same couch he envisioned fucking you on multiple times. You’ve thought it before, but Jay is a great lover. A pleaser. He loves to give pleasure to his partners more than receiving it. Even still, you give him what he is owed. His hand guides your head as you slobber all over his cock. 

“Fuck.” He grunts, as you hollow your cheeks. You flick your tongue around the head as you fondle his balls. Pulling back, you let your drool drip down his length before you dive in to suck his balls. 

If Jay didn’t know any better, he’d think you to be a succubus. Because you were definitely sucking his soul, straight out of his ballsack.

Not wanting to cum too soon, he pulls you off. Then he lays you on the couch and lines himself up with your entrance. “Do you care if I wear a condom or not?”

“No. You’re my husband, right? Cum in me. I’m yours.” And Jay is groaning as he sinks into your heat. You hold hands as he rocks into you at a steady pace. 

It doesn’t take much longer for you both to reach your high. You pull him closer as he cums inside of you. Lips locked in a passionate kiss. “Thank you.” He whispers against your lips. 

That night had been euphoric. You were content to believe that everything had progressed for the better. But perhaps, the joke was on you. You and Jay seemed to find middle ground. Him actively working on talking to you and coming home at reasonable times. After that night of passionate sex, he even took to kissing you. But most things don’t last if his mother is involved. That was one thing Jay couldn’t improve. Her deplorable behavior. She set Jay up on a date. 

How you found out was accidental. Jay had discarded his phone on the counter when he walked in the house. He went to shower, stating he had a business dinner to tend to later that night. It really was a shame that he had his text previews on. Because his mother kept blowing up his phone with messages. The final one? A picture of a fair skinned young woman with an innocent gaze. Then the time and place. Followed up with, ‘don’t be late.’

Everything around you seemed to stop. There was no way Jay was about to go on this date his mother had set up. Had the sex meant nothing to him? Was he… playing you? 

Confused, you just set the phone down and waited for him to come back out. He was dressed in burgundy dress pants with a crème polo shirt. He wore an Armani watch with a brown band and gold face. Hair slicked back, he looked good. And he smelled it too. 

“Hi.” He smiled softly, kissing your cheek. He moved behind you to pick up his phone. You analyzed him as he read the messages. Facial expression unreadable, he pockets his phone, moving towards the walkway entrance. Picking up his wallet and keys, he turns back to you. There you stand in the living room doorway. 

“I’ll be back later tonight, baby.” Baby. A slip of the tongue that he had gotten used to calling you. 

“Where did you say you were going again?” 

“Bella Noche Bistro. I have a reservation for 9 PM. I’m already running behind. I need to be out the door.” He rushes over to give you one more kiss, and then he is gone.

Bella Noche Bistro at 9 PM. With Hwang Soyeon. The exact same text message his mother sent him. The son of a bitch was playing you.

Trying to calm your mind, you spent the next hour and a half cleaning. Part of you wishes you never cleaned Jay’s office. However, the other part of you that strongly identifies as his wife, is glad. Going through his drawers, straightening up things, you discover something you probably shouldn’t have. There, sitting on top of another stack of papers is a document. Which reads ‘Divorce Agreement’ in bold letters. 

Jongseong planned on… divorcing you? Sitting down, you take a moment to gather your thoughts. So, that’s why he was out at these late night dinners. He was shopping for a new wife. At least that’s what you told yourself. 

Every part of you is pissed regarding this. How could he do this to you? After everything you’ve been through? Your entire life was upended for him. You suffered through a traumatic miscarriage. You were depressed, alone. But you stuck it out and stayed with him. Yet this is how he repays you? 

Betrayal shot like an arrow deep into your heart. The red string of fate that tied you to Jongseong felt so much like a noose in this given moment. Everything is so impossible with this family. Between his mother and him, you aren’t sure who deserves your wrath more at this moment. But not to worry. You would bide your time. This marks the official checkpoint of you checking out. You were done, tired of being life’s punching bag. So you put the paper back, close the drawer, turn off the light, and walk back out of that fucking place. Showering, you figure out exactly what to do. 

You wouldn’t act now though. You would be patient.

And you would mention nothing of it to Jay when he comes home with syrupy lips of whiskey. And you would say nothing as he kisses you, making love to you again and again. All while shopping around for dates. And you would just smile, as he left for another day of work. Then you would pick up the phone and call Hyori. Because Hyori and Mei had their own plan separate from you, one that required an upheaval of their lives. 

A relative of Hyori’s had passed away. And being their only next of kin, left her a nice, spacious home off on the coast. As her inheritance, she wanted to turn it into a bed and breakfast. They had floated the idea to you a month ago, stating that they would move there permanently. It hand stung then, to hear that your two new friends planned on leaving. You felt selfish in wanting them to stay. But now, there was no need. Because you were about to give the Park family exactly what they wanted. 

If a divorce was what they wanted, then a divorce was what they would get. 

A few days later, when Jay is out, you would go back to his office to look through his things. The document in question, unmoved from where you left it. It seemed as though he was really considering this. Well, you’d just have to beat him to the punch then wouldn’t you? Flipping through the pages, you would find the dotted line your signature needed to be on. In just a few short swoops, it would be signed. Once again, sealing your fate. 

And a week from now, when Jay comes home. You will be long gone. 

© seoulfulbliss— all rights reserved to this archive. please don’t repost without my permission. modifications of any kind is not tolerated, this is my creative content.

[year2000electronics]

Your fiddleford monster au design makes me have so many questions in a good way. Gnawing on the bars on my enclosure kind of way. Does the curse seemingly not affect him in his one year stay helping Ford, and so he does that all himself? Does The Curse, as vague as it is, count that; and drive people to modify themselves and draw away from humanity? Like its not just this magical effect that happens but an active thing in the back of your mind to turn away from what you were born as and embrace something else? Ogh. I'm suddenly a lot more invested in this au

VERY INTERESTING QUESTIONS TO BE CERTAIN so fiddleford is a bit of a unique case where his "monster" theming is tied directly to his decline yes!

full answer under the cut it got long

in my mind, monster falls' curse is tied directly to gravity falls' natural law of weirdness magnetism/"the barrier" keeping bill in. once youve stayed there long enough for the curse to even BEGIN, it becomes harder to leave the town. you just feel drawn to it, and a dull ache in your soul if you leave. so obviously, when ford gets turned into a mothman, he does fully accept that because hes always felt more cryptid than man. but when the time comes for him to ask fiddleford for help, he lays out that "hey, youd be doing me a BIG favour if you came to help with the portal, but this town curses you if you stay for too long so itll only be a few weeks, i promise"

fidds agrees, because hey, whats a few weeks with an old friend? besides, he'll have his wife and son as an anchor to go back to. but the more he thinks about it, the more he likes staying with ford, the more he's reminded of those old times, and the more the curse starts influencing those kinds of thoughts to get louder and louder (but its not ALL the curse you know. still some autonomy in the situation) and so he keeps postponing his return date, almost "tempting fate" about the curse, because he doesn't really feel any different! his friend sprouted wings and antennae! he'd know by now, so he won't check! and ford shrugs and is like "well, alright, it's your choice, we can surely get a little closer to the point of no return"

and yknow, fiddleford denying that the curse could possibly be affecting him is almost like him in canon struggling to reconcile with his two "lives"- his home life and his life with ford. he wants to have his cake and eat it too, because he's just too timid to ever say no.

anyways, one day he wakes up and realizing he's heard the sound of technology near him for a while, and looks around, and realizes it's following him from room to room-

the beeping IS him. it's definitely been a year, he's already been cursed. it's just that he's a robot that looks near-human, just near-human enough that he could turn a blind eye to it and pretend like it never happened and that everything was fine. which i think kinda suits how ford loves the supernatural to a very personal degree, meanwhile fidds got roped into the town by pure happenstance

but. yknow, being a robot that looks human means youre still a robot. and it's a lot harder to erase things from a robot's "brain" without causing some major problems. haven't you ever been programming something or filling out an html code, and then you accidentally delete one thing you thought was inconsequential and all of a sudden youre staring at just a wall of code that's busted because whatever you removed, you DEFINITELY SHOULD NOT HAVE removed?

parts of fiddleford just go kaput and start breaking because he's purposely taking out large chunks of code from his own brain that end up being collateral from the memory gun. because, yknow, the memory gun is imprecise! it was designed for human brains! cos thats what fidds was for years! so it's like if you tried to repair a computer by ripping out the motherboard with pliers

thats my take on it anyways. Ya

[raavenb2619]

I enjoyed posting my reactions to Koisenu Futari, so I think I'm going to do that going forward with media I'm consuming as I feel like it. (These will tend to be more unpolished reactions and surface level analysis than polished essay deep dives.)

The Murderbot Diaries, book 1: All Systems Red (spoilers under the cut)

Chapter 1

Murder, entertainment, and capitalism all in the first sentence

Failure at being a heartless killing machine is an interesting juxtaposition through an aro lens. Failure to meet societal expectations of normalcy versus failure to fulfill societal arophobic tropes

Getting the vibe this narrator is not gonna be the most reliable

PoV character is an android, so there’s likely to be themes of demihumanity and in-betweenness

Mensah is struggling against bureaucracy in the emergency, so bureaucracy is likely another theme, since it’s somewhat interchangeable with society. Could also lean more towards questions of power, agency, autonomy, as an aro/robot thing.

“It had three compartments: one big one in the middle for the human crew and two smaller ones to each side for cargo, supplies, and me.” Dehumanization/objectification

Cracked governor module as closeted aromantic, hmm.

Are HubSystem and MedSystem part of the PoV character, or external to them? Getting a little Ancillary Justice vibes, which I need to reread and then read the rest of the series.

The PoV character is having to tend to their wounds and healing on their own, which has nonpartnering vibes

Well, no, they’re just second priority.

Yep, unreliable narrator. You are nervous about your governor module. (Hm, very loose connection to Little Lost Robot by Isaac Asimov)

Demihumanity as valuable, because it has agency/free will that pure roboticism would lack

Casual polyamory. Nice.

A “glitch” in HubSystem? This definitely won’t be relevant to the plot later, lol

Chapter 2

Ah, capitalism.

Mm, yeah, autism.

Ah, surveillance capitalism and a lack of privacy. My favorite.

… I’m gonna need to make a relationship diagram to keep track of all that.

“It was a low-stress group, they didn’t argue much or antagonize each other for fun, and were fairly restful to be around, as long as they didn’t try to talk or interact with me in any way.” Lol

“She turned to me with one of those abrupt movements that I had taught myself not to react to.” Autism.

“I said, “I need to check the perimeter,” and managed to turn and leave the crew area in a totally normal way and not like I was fleeing from a bunch of giant hostiles.” XD

“I’d watched three episodes of Sanctuary Moon and was fast forwarding through a sex scene” XD. (Ace sex-repulsed robot can be an acephobic trope, but I’ve heard good things about this series so I’m expecting it won’t be)

“Though I think that even if I did have sex-related parts I would find them boring.)” Yeah okay there’s some ace robot nuance.

Chapter 3

Ah, buddy, you could probably use some therapy.

A second HubSystem glitch. Interesting. To what extent is HubSystem non-diegetically a person?

Chapter 4

“Imitative Human Bot Units are . . . partially constructed from cloned material.” Set up for identity crisis, and/or asexual reproduction jokes

It/its as probably dehumanizing, but could be reclaimed at some point

That’s a lot of combat in a very short amount of time

Hacking via data port ties to loss of autonomy

Chapter 5

So far, an aspec/robot reading of this feels…a little uninteresting? I don’t think it’s that it’s tasteless, it’s just…there’s lots of interesting stuff to say about Asimov’s writing, or DADoES, and about halfway through it doesn’t feel like there’s much to analyze or interpret. An aro robot on itself doesn’t have much room for nuance; the interesting parts of media analysis are usually what’s hidden under the surface, and so far it doesn’t feel like there’s much.

Interesting backstory with the hacked governor module

“I was still watching them through the camera, because it was easier than looking directly at them.” Autism

Good on you, Mensah

Chapter 6

“It’s wrong to think of a construct as half bot, half human. It makes it sound like the halves are discrete, like the bot half should want to obey orders and do its job and the human half should want to protect itself and get the hell out of here. As opposed to the reality, which was that I was one whole confused entity, with no idea what I wanted to do. What I should do. What I needed to do.” Mm. That’s giving thoughts, but I don’t know what they are yet.

Getting some more roboticism, but still feels a bit thin. I’m not sure, maybe that’s just me.

Too expensive to destroy. Interesting.

Chapter 7

Getting adopted/found family vibes, which I’m a fan of

Chapter 8

Yep.

“This was what I was supposed to want. This was what everything had always told me I was supposed to want.” Mm.

“I don’t know what I want. I said that at some point, I think. But it isn’t that, it’s that I don’t want anyone to tell me what I want, or to make decisions for me. That’s why I left you, Dr. Mensah, my favorite human. By the time you get this I’ll be leaving Corporation Rim. Out of inventory and out of sight.” Mm yeah. Yeah.

[icyrambles]

y'know i love idw1. it is by far my favourite continuity purely because it has the balls to actually do some weird fucked up shit with those robots but one of my forever gripes with the series was how they handled the combiners.

also spoilers for idw1 (not massive but enough that i should warn ya if you haven't read through the series)

not in the sense that i hate combiners or combination but mostly just because i think it's weird that they never tackle the horror of being a combiner. it's never really touched on that most of the combiners were forced together and that combining has a permanent effect on a cybertronian's mind.

sure you've got prowl but idw is written so that the reader is meant to hate prowl, or at the very least dislike him, so you're automatically geared to not give a fuck if he's suffering a little bit. and his relationship with the constructicons is never really given the screentime it probably should've gotten so we never get to hear their opinions on being forcibly fused with an autobot's mind. (clearly they don't seem to mind it at the very least but i have a hard time believing that they just magically were okay with suddenly being part of a gestalt)

first aid literally shows up on cybertron with five other guys that he's only vaguely familiar with and starscream just decides that they're "good enough" and forces them into a gestalt. and then we literally never get to see if first aid gave a fuck about this whole situation. hell one of his gestalt members, rook, literally gets killed in lost light and first aid just, doesn't care, and neither do any of his gestalt mates. they're just like, "eh, moving on"

fucking hell, sunstreaker, ironhide, mirage, and motherfucking optimus prime get put into a gestalt with prowl and the most they have to say is "wow prowl you're really fucked up" and that's it. do they just all have to deal with the consequences of being a combiner. optimus never seems to bring it up ever again and neither does sunstreaker, even when they're in the same place together.

the combaticons seem to be rather fucked up about the whole thing, but that's not because being in a combiner team fucked them up, it's more because they combined with a fucking corpse and sharing a mind with a brain dead swindle seriously sucked ass.

like think about the effect of combination for a quick second.

a mech is forced to share everything about themself, from memories, to thoughts and emotions with another group of mecha (up to five depending on the combiner) and they just, don't get a fucking choice in it. idw talks a lot about bodily autonomy, what with the themes of functionalism and cold constructed mechs but they don't seem to apply the same emotion to the combiners. they're just a plot tool to be throw around when the writers needed a big bad to face or a defender against some type of higher force

combiners are only scary because they're big and angry and difficult to control but the real fear should be focused on the existential horror of having a character whose mind is forcibly fused together with another group of people

[halsaph]

alright whats this artdrone killbot thing

hi. You will regret asking this

The Murderbot Diaries is a series of books about a human-bot construct that was designed to essentially exist as an enslaved security guard / piece of sentient spyware. It's like if Alexa had half a human brain and a gun. We're introduced to Murderbot (the murder alexa) roughly 3 years after it's hacked the piece of hardware in it's brain that forces it to obey commands. In those 3 years it hasn't changed much about it's life except now while working as a subhuman slave it watches tv when no one is paying attention. As a series TMBD largely is about themes of personhood and discovering yourself when you have largely spent your life being denied the right to a sense of self. They also don't shy away from addressing the trauma that Murderbot has experienced from having it's autonomy stripped of it for most of it's life, with the second novella and most recent novel most heavily featuring that as an element. (Although that is a core aspect of Murderbot's character that informs its decisions throughout the entire series).

Murderbot as a character is bitingly sarcastic and witty, deeply paranoid and ultimately filled with the constant low level anxiety it doesn't know what it's doing (not necessarily moment by moment but overall, with it's freedom, with it's life). It's an excellent unreliable narrator because it only tells you exactly what it thinks is important in a scenario, relationships between other characters, physical features of itself and the people around it, it's own emotions and reactions often being completely brushed over with only occasional clues, and often outright misinterpreting people's actions, most often it's own. It has this ever present self loathing in the first several books where it constantly explains it's actions away in the least charitable interpretation possible even though we see time and time again that at it's core it deeply wants to help and protect the people around it. And we see over the course of the books as it starts learning how to make choices for itself and interacting with people who treat it with respect and develops a support system as it starts to move away from that mindset (with the exception of the most recent book but to be fair to MB System Collapse is about it being forced to confront it's PTSD and it's backsliding alot from recently being thrown back into a situation from its worst nightmares). I said before its a human-bot construct to explain that it isn't purely an inorganic being but Murderbot is a deeply inhuman character and openly has no desire to be human, and it's perspective as something that is made to be a security system and enmesh into both digital and hardwired surveillance is fascinating to read. As you know I deeply deeply love robots, they're my favorite kind of 'inhuman but still a Person' kind of character and Murderbot perfectly strikes the balance between a starkly in human way of thinking and deeply relatable emotions that draws me to robots as a whole, especially as an autistic person (and Murderbot was intentionally written with autistic traits but in a subversion of the typical ableist depiction of autistic robots so that EXTRA rings true lmao)

seeing as you mentioned it I will also explain ART as a character, ART is one of the reoccurring characters in the series (the first 3 novellas all have completely different casts outside of Murderbot itself as it hops from place to place trying to decide what it wants and who it is before in the fourth novella and beyond bringing back in previous characters and having them start to overlap throughout the rest of the series). It was introduced in the second book and is arguably the character that has the greatest impact on Murderbot as a person although I say arguably bc I would personally still say that's Mensah. Unarguably tho it is one of the most important people in Murderbot's life and has been described multiple times now by the author as the love of its life (although not necessarily in a romantic sense as Murderbot is both within text and confirmed via word of god acearo). ART (Asshole Research Transport) also known as the Perihelion (although not until the 5th book/first novel bc Murderbot doesn't bother to tell tell the readers its name until then, instead deciding its a dick so its gonna exclusively call it by an insult) is a spaceship's pilot AI, made to be sentient instead of the usual smart GPS as an experiment by the university is was made by. It was raised like a child by a pair of scientists who are now part of its crew (along with its sibling Iris) and now is a teaching vessel for students learning about deep space and also anticorporate espionage worker (don't worry about it). It's a giant pushy asshole unless you're a child (the only character we've ever seen it meet on screen it didn't in some way immediately threaten was a 16 yo). It can't watch tv without having to pause at the suspenseful bits to calm down. We're introduced to it by it threatening to melt Murderbot's mind and then pouting when it's scared shitless. It then a month later asks to do surgery on it. It fully intends to blow up a planet to get Murderbot back from a group of colonists that captured it until someone talks it out of it because that isn't effective hostage negotiation.

[gabriellerudessa]

After some recent posts around here in the Fallout fandom, there's one thing that I hadn't really thought about but now weights heavily in my mind and I just want to put the thoughts down.

Lucy and The Ghoul reflect and parallel HEAVILY Dolores and The Man in Black from Westworld, the other show Jonathan Nolan directed (and also someone from the writing, I think, but his name is the only one I remember and I'm feeling lazy in searching the other name now). Others have pointed this, but there's one specific point regarding Dolores and Lucy that is making me think.

There's one theme very prevalent for both, beyond the "the world I live is a lie", and that one is bodily autonomy and being able to do your own choices, despite what the Powers That Be Dictate.

Dolores was literally a robot, seen as an object to be desired and conquered, that repeated the same day over and over again and was repeatedly raped by The Man in Black and had her memories erased at the end of each day. Lucy is a tool of Vault Tec, indoctrinated since a child that her main value is as someone that can have kids; that's the whole point of her discourse at the start of the show, proving that she's a good alternative to marry and have kids and do her duty to the Vault. There's a reason Monty is called a "Breeder" by Moldaver and no one bats an eye: in the end, they are all breeders to Vault 31 experiment. Including Lucy, and that's a little bit of how she's still behaving with Maximus when inviting him to Vault 33: having a husband to have kids and keep the Vault going, even if Reclamation Day is not a thing. It's what she was raised to think and believe. Until the moment Moldaver tells the truth about her father and Vault Tec and then The Ghoul corroborates it, she has rose-colored lenses regarding the Vault life. Still hopes to return to it and live as it was expected.

Considering how so many things parallel in the characters between both shows, and how much I think Lucy has a very aro-coded behavior towards relationships, I would sincerely not find it weird if she decided to remain alone, similarly to Dolores, both because of the transformation she's going in the Wasteland, and because of how the wool regarding Vault Tec is being pulled from her eyes, how the option of not having kids, not needing to permanently connect herself with someone if she doesn't want to, are things she actually has. She can choose for herself, without needing to worry about the Vault population, because the surface is dangerous but not all bad and they can take in people like Vault 4, because Vault Tec has been lying to them, for a number of reasons.

Lucy had her body autonomy denied by Vault Tec - she was a breeder, someone to have a kid and keep the population going - and by The Ghoul - bait and then trafficked for her organs. She recovered her body autonomy when she got free in the Super Duper Mart, and now she can discover that this autonomy extends towards what's expected of her regarding her role in the Vault. She feared she was being sold as a sex slave, but if we think deeply, what was expected of her in the Vault wasn't that much different, it just had a prettier package and it was what she was raised to think as right.

I sincerely don't know what they'll do, regarding Lucy and Maximus, regarding Lucy and The Ghoul, regarding The Ghoul and Barb. But considering how Dolores was worked in Westworld, including the Wyatt alter-ego/previous-iteration, and how heavily Lucy parallels her, I wouldn't be surprised at a development that goes neither Max or Ghoul.

(ALSO I SURE HOPE THEY DON'T DO WITH THE GHOUL AS IT WAS DONE WITH THE MAN IN BLACK/WILLIAM, MEANING, KILL HIS OWN DAUGHTER NOT KNOWING IT'S ACTUALLY HER)

[boredtechnologist]

Williams "Robotron 2084" arcade - attract mode

Reviewing Williams' "Robotron: 2084" from a deep philosophical perspective invites a fascinating exploration of the game's underlying themes, aesthetics, and the existential questions it raises, both intentionally and inadvertently.

1. Man vs. Machine - A Reflection on Technological Progress: "Robotron: 2084" centers around the classic theme of humanity's struggle against its own creations - the robots. Philosophically, this can be viewed as a commentary on the anxieties and paradoxes of technological advancement. As players fight against a relentless horde of machines, the game echoes fears of technology becoming uncontrollable or turning against its creators. This mirrors existential concerns about the role of technology in human life and its potential to both enhance and undermine the human experience.

2. The Individual vs. The Collective: The game's premise, where a single protagonist battles against an overwhelming collective force, touches on philosophical debates about individualism versus collectivism. The player's lone character, constantly battling overwhelming odds, can be seen as a metaphor for the individual's struggle to maintain identity and autonomy in the face of societal or technological collectives that threaten to subsume individuality.

3. The Sisyphean Struggle and Absurdism: "Robotron: 2084" offers no end, only an ongoing battle against an endless stream of enemies. This can be philosophically interpreted through the lens of Albert Camus' concept of the absurd hero, akin to Sisyphus' eternal struggle. The game's never-ending nature and the player's inevitable defeat reflect the absurdity of life and the idea that meaning and value come from struggle itself, rather than any final victory or conclusion.

4. Ethical Implications of Artificial Intelligence: On a more contemporary note, "Robotron: 2084" raises ethical questions about artificial intelligence and its implications for humanity. The robots, originally designed to serve humans but now their adversaries, symbolize the ethical dilemmas and potential dangers associated with AI. This aspect of the game prompts philosophical inquiry into the responsibilities of creators towards their creations and the ethical limits of artificial intelligence.

5. Nostalgia and the Human Psyche: From a more psychological perspective, the game's retro style and enduring popularity can be seen as an embodiment of nostalgia and a longing for simpler times. This raises questions about the human tendency to idealize the past and whether such nostalgia is a comforting escape or a barrier to confronting current realities.

6. Aesthetics and the Nature of Video Games as Art: "Robotron: 2084," with its distinctive 1980s arcade graphics and sound, contributes to the philosophical discussion about video games as a form of art. The game's style, gameplay, and enduring appeal challenge traditional notions of what constitutes artistic merit and invite players to consider the artistic value inherent in game design and the interactive experience.

In conclusion, "Robotron: 2084," while ostensibly a simple arcade game, offers rich material for philosophical exploration. Themes of man versus machine, individual versus collective, the absurdity of endless struggle, ethical considerations of AI, the role of nostalgia, and the nature of video games as art all converge in this classic game, demonstrating the profound potential for video games to engage with deep philosophical concepts and questions.

[corporatevalue]

🔮

[MUN TALKS ABOUT MUSE]

🔮 What do you see in your muse’s future? 

Honestly! How character development in isola turns out for J depends on a Lot of uncertain variables, so I'm not sure! I can only speculate.

Thouuuugh, it's pretty clear that for the time-being, the train 's headed downwards. J is not coping all too well with knowing that her memory is Not safe from interference either, even without defying Cyn, because of alternative allegory proving that the stars are capable of messing with it also. So, she's doubling down on the repression & insistence that she's a mere robot to avoid a crisis over the lack of anything Solid, and uhh… yeah its just a huge spire mountain of self-dehumanization man

her constant mood is just. Functioning. right now. not Good not Bad just. STATUS: FUNCTIONING. yea

BUT! It's a pretty frail state to be in, so I'm not expecting the trend to last. It should tilt to either directions, depending on future events. I'm honestly going to let ✨ The Story ✨ take the wheel instead of manually tipping the scales to a favoured direction, buuuuuut… i Will say that it'd be really sweet to see if J, maybe, in the far future, gets the opportunity to get ahold of autonomy again and just… figure out what she wants to do for Herself instead of what she is Supposed To™

its one of these things where I feel like, from an outside perspective, it'd not be much of a shift in change — still being the bossy, confident superior employee spouting corporate jargon at you. But, it'd be an immense shift internally; how she thinks of herself, how she makes decisions, how she values those around her, etc. etc. & it would be a subtle change from the outside, too: a less frustrated, and especially less tired disposition, replacing her current "confidence" with a more healthy version of it.

It's also where I'd reaaally like to include my trans headcanon in; I enjoy transitioning as a narrative device for self-discovery, and Gender for drones really is usually just a topic of self-expression — except, I'm sure J has just been going with what Tessa had given her at the start, instead of spending the time and introspection necessary to Indulge in aforementioned self-expression, considering how she doesn't do that kind of "What Do I Want"-introspection for all other aspects in her life, too. It just makes sense that she hasn't yet with self-expression, either.

Learning to loosen her iron grip on old memories, giving herself the free reign to discover and express who she is, altering her appearance to be Different than from all those years where she'd always been attached to some form of strings, be it the previous owners, the elliotts, or cyn, and transitioning to a Not perfectly binary appearance to let go of the obsessive need to be a model example of a jcjenson product, to let go of the obsessive need to not be broken— in just so many ways, I feel the headcanon plays so nicely with these themes.

…

But! Ya know. That requires A Lot! veryyy possible she'll just continue doubling down after doubling down, Especially with how she now feels Double trapped within spirale </3 Whoopsie!

[dykeyote]

hi i do not know what the theia n adam thingy is about but. please do elaborate because now i am curious

OOOOO OKAY so quick theia summary [SEASON 2 JUNOVERSE SPOILERS IN THIS WHOLE POST LOL i try not to spoil any more than is necessary but i do spoil a Lot just bc u kinda have to . no spoilers for anything after that tho i havent even listened to s4] is that the theia in the penumbra podcast is basically this cybernetic eye that the protagonist is given by this like sort of father figure thats attempting to manipulate him through positive attention and shit theres a bunch of other lore going on there but thats all u really need to know for this post . it starts as helpful and gets said protag back on his feet but begins to take more and more control of his life and it looks like his weirdo bf at one point . this isnt a great summary whoopsie but it serves

n e ways so my thought is that sydney having that and it being adam and taking advantage of his emotions of loneliness would be kind of cool .... and instead of being a robotic woman voice its jsut this weirdo fucking guy who he sort of hallucinates in his vision because of how the eye works . i think lucille gave it to him partially bc of similar themes to the original show but also because lucille would totally just have like freaky future age technology lying around for no reason to manipiulate people plus it furthers the themes of sydney relying on her medically . also the adamtheia is red instead of blue bc thats cool

anyway so adam sort of acts as a therapist still but maybe a physical therapist also?? bc he controls sydneys faculties kinda . which sydney at first finds great becasue hes not lonely anymore but he starts slowly realizing hes losing his autonomy but by this point its too late . i think adam does take the form of jedidiah sometimes also to make a point or to trick sydney which happens in the show as well but defintely NOT in the way the show did bc jedidiah would be too embarrassed to ever wear that fucking slutty little nightgown and sydney would know something was up instantaneously lmao

ermies but diverging from the canon stuff MORE i think itd be cool if adam was more sentient and maybe kinda diverged from what lucille wanted?? like lucille had her own weird manipulative gains but adam is weird and freaky and alive and tries to make things happen to fuck lucille over and get his own weird goals achieved

also i think itd be cool if like . idk how sydney lost his eye but Somehow he did idk ill work this out later and the weird uppy adam eye was originally jedidiahs work?? maybe thats how its so freaky and magical and advanced engineering-wise . bc i do think hed make a cybernetic eye that is maybe a little overly helpful to the degree of having some queries about whether its healthy for it to help u w so much or if its bordering on losing full autonomy but it wouldnt be MALICIOUS or intentionally controlling or violating jedidiah is just weird about being helpful . but then some Force like probably a mix of both lucille and just adams ai take it and warp it and make it way more Maliciously controlling and intentionally intrusive (mostly bc i thinkt he parallels between jedidiahs Unhealthy But Well Intentioned controlling traits and other characters including lucille's Malicious controlling traits are quite interesting)

i imagine this being kinda vaguely season one.... like a season one divergent thing . i think itd be kinda cool if there was a parallel of the gun scene from promised land (for context the theia manipulates the protag into shooting someone) but with elijah .... mostly bc i thnk Wihle jedidiahs actively ignoring sydney would make sydney very easily manipulated via his loneliness and need for guidance which adam-theia-thing would provide 2 him

[cosmokyrin]

Penny‘s current state

Okay so now that I've had time to process the whole bajillion things that happened in the latest ep, I think I kind of wrapped around my head on what happened to Penny.

I think a good part of the FNDM's reaction (including mine) was because there was always investment in Penny being a robot / android. The original appeal of her character was because she was a robot with the mind of a person. She struggled like a human would regarding her feelings vs her programming. And that's valid. In fact, pretty sure a lot of us found her quirky and adorable and rooted for her because of this.

But now I feel like, while I got invested with her being a robot, and thought she would stay that way forever, what RWBY did was made me realize the concept of Penny being a soul contained (or “trapped”) within a robotic body. We liked her being a robot, a whole lot, sure. But the thing is that wasn't exactly what Penny was, all this time. Since Volume 2, we know that she always felt insecure about her "realness". I thought, and held on to the thought that it was because she was a robot, but no, it's not because she was a robot - but because she was an artificial intelligence. And she was never certain of her agency that time. She always had that thought gnawing at the back of her head, that she was just a programming (remember in V8C5 when Cinder hit her below the belt saying, "If you weren't built that way!" implying that so long as Penny was a robot, her autonomy was uncertain).

Throughout RWBY, Ruby and her other friends always pointed out that she has a soul. There was always emphasis in the soul (V8C12 Ruby: “Her soul is who she is.”). They never talked to Penny as a robot at all, they always spoke directly to her. Because the show always emphasized that past that mechanical body, they were all interacting with a soul, just as you wouldn't say Alphonse Elric (Full Metal Alchemist) was just a large armor talking and moving like a human. Alphonse was a soul trapped in a mechanical body, just like Penny was. The goal for Alphonse was to return to his original body using the Philosopher’s Stone. Penny’s goal was to have her soul break free from being trapped in a body that always made her doubt her autonomy / agency.

In a way as well, Penny sort of transcended death. I think the emphasis on her mechanical body breaking down like that was meant to make a point. That would have been Penny without a soul -- cold and emotionless. But because she was more than that, she got past the death of her body and was able to live as Penny herself. She was not her body. That was just a part of her, and she can shed it away because it was not her. (The metaphysical aspects of this is sending me jsljfs). Personally I feel sad about seeing that breakdown, because I got so used to knowing Penny as a robot / android, but now she's past that, because all her being a robot was just temporary for her character (though it was a really looong arc, if we count by the years RWBY has aired).

So what is Penny now? I think, as others have pointed out, she is just indeed some walking entity of sorts. Since the episode seemed to emphasize that Penny was always the intelligence behind the robot, she's just like Vision from Avengers now. She's technically a manifestation of the reality she formed for herself (aka, her personal belief that she's a real girl / person). See, Vision went directly from being an AI (Jarvis, "confined" in a network different from our reality) to a manifested physical body, but definitely not human. That's Penny.

Penny is now, in a sense, truly free or her confinement. Not what I expected it to be, but I think that's pretty neat. I think the whole thing is a callback to the “I want to live my life” theme from V8C5. I'll definitely miss her being a robot, but Penny is still Penny without being an android. Though imagine now if it's possible that Penny can shapeshift, or go Green Lantern on herself :)

[witnessourescape]

On Omega's origins

I'm trying to make some posts on Omega so I don't lose track of what I think about the funny robot. :) What we know about Omega's planet:

It was in a war against the Dragonstar;

It considered Midgardsormr a threat;

It completely destroyed the Dragonstar;

It's presumably gone, having seen a Calamity.

I'll talk about each point. I believe there are already clues to what Omega's original planet is in the game.

1. It was in a war against the Dragonstar

Contrary to common belief, what happened in the Dragonstar was not that Omega alone randomly attacked it for no reason (or to get stronger) -- Omega and its planet were locked in an interplanetary war. We don't know why -- yet.

Midgardsormr: Foolish machine. What hast thou to show for all the years that have passed since the culmination of our war? Naught save thy continued existence. Hast thou no thought for what befalleth thy home star…?

2. It considered Midgardsormr a threat

Omega's objective was to kill Midgardsormr. Not to enslave, not to colonize the planet: to kill the Father of Dragons, paragon of wyrms, because it was a threat.

Omega: Prepare to face Midgardsormr--red-maned wyrm of the Dragonstar, and nemesis of my world.

3. It completely destroyed the Dragonstar.

"By thee and thine was my home laid waste". The Dragonstar as we see in Alphascape 2.0 seems devoid of life, aetherically unbalanced. If those are aether geysers, then something must have gone really wrong. Omega's planet didn't enslave the dragons or something like that -- they killed the Dragonstar itself.

4. It's presumably gone, having seen a Calamity.

Let's get back to this piece of dialogue.

Midgardsormr: Foolish machine. What hast thou to show for all the years that have passed since the culmination of our war? Naught save thy continued existence. Hast thou no thought for what befalleth thy home star…?

What did befell Omega's home star, after all? Why does Midgardsormr knows of it and why does he uses it to try to provoke Omega? Could it be related to their war? Could Midgardsormr have been responsible for Omega's planet's destruction?

The answer probably lies in From the Heavens, Final Omega's theme.

Our shadows lost in light, this life A fleeting kiss Hark! Temptation rings! Virtue slips through hands a-clenching wicked fruit Passion festers, black’ning sinless souls to root Sink’neath dark waters Drink deep, we suffer Drowning, drowning, drowning, drowning Irons sundered Paradise plundered Come welcome this Come welcome this Destiny Virtue slips through hands a-clenching wicked fruit Passion festers, black’ning sinless souls to root Sickles grate on heaven’s gate their fields ignored Seeking sinners deathlessly they reap discord As two become one Here ends this, our journey Never-ending, onward march! Witness our escape This our escape, this our escape This our escape, this our escape This our escape, this our ascension

From the Heavens tells the story of a society falling to hubris, temptation and sin, their paradise destroyed. Isn't that familiar?

Still on From the Heavens, it's strange that the first sentence is "our shadows lost in light": ascian means literally shadowless -- this is why the Heroes' Gauntlet set is called the Shadowless set. Then, "[sink] 'neath dark waters" is literally Amaurot's theme.

So, is there any other evidence Omega could be an Ancient machine?

Lots of them.

1. Omega and the Ascians got similar designs: both heavily use black and silver, and gold and purple as accents (Omega has a purple undertone and Final Omega has gold accents).

2. Omega and the Ascians share abilities: creation magicks and interdimensional travelling. It's not because they're both unsundered beings: I can't remember dragons having creation magicks or travelling interdimensionally. Midgardsormr enters Omega's rift in his Big form at the cost of his life energy. It isn't something that he does naturally and with ease.

3. Omega and the Ascians share a neighborhood at the Aetherial Rift, which is where ascians hide when they need to.

4. The Passionate Amaurotine NPC has weird dialogue about death-defying autonomous figures.

Passionate Amaurotine: Oh, did you want to ask me about my latest concept again? The autonomous figures I told you about before? They are utterly without feeling or fear, and will without hesitation or objection carry out their master's orders regardless of any injury or death they may suffer as a result. Truly magnificent, wouldn't you agree?

5. Both Amaurot the Dungeon and Omega quote the biblical Book of Revelation. This one may be the most important yet: the Final Days are akin to the christian Apocalypse as seen in the Book of Revelation. In the end of the Book of Revelation, Christ makes His Second Coming, saying:

12 Look, I am coming soon! My reward is with me, and I will give to each person according to what they have done. 13 I am the Alpha and the Omega, the First and the Last, the Beginning and the End.

Meanwhile, Final Omega's dialogue in O12SP2 is:

Final Omega: Experiment concluded. I am the Alpha. I am the Omega. Final Omega: <blip> <bleeeeeep> Witness...my coming... I bring...reward...and retribution...for all!

The dialogue in Japanese makes it even clearer that Omega is quoting Revelation 22:12 and Revelation 22:13. I'll make a post on it later. Why would the Ancients develop a war machine like Omega? Weren't them pacifists? Everybody is a pacifist until eldtrich abominations start banging at your door!

Research Report on the Akadaemia Anyder: High-ranking phantomologists have since been dispatched to afflicted areas, where they conducted the capture and transport of a single entity. This specimen, characterized by a disproportionately large maw, was dubbed “Archaeotania,” and investigations into its aetheric composition are ongoing. A theory posited by the esteemed Lahabrea suggests that the shape these fiendish beings assume is not random, but rather an amalgamation of the fears which lurk beneath our rational minds. As of this writing, researchers have begun pursuing methods by which potent guardians of deliberate design might be engendered to stand against this mounting threat.

Emet-Selch says Zodiark was summoned to rewrite the laws of the star because they went haywire with the creation magicks going wild, not to halt the monsters themselves. The Ancients also took time to develop the concept of Zodiark. Something must have been keeping the monsters at bay while the Convocation worked, and as we see in the Passionate Amaurotine NPC, there is some precedent that the Amaurotines could develop a death-defying autonomous figure ready to sacrifice itself for its masters if needed. How does the Dragonstar War enters the scenario, then? First, let's go back to Archaeotania. Archaeotania is a dragon.

It looks like a dragon-dinosaur mix, it attacks with Megaflare and Gigaflare, it has lots of Shinryu's -- who is a Midgardsormr-based primal -- attacks like Tidal Wave and Ice Boulder. Archaeotania, being one of the original fears that were birthed by creation magicks going haywire, must have been influenced by a dragon. Meanwhile, Omega ignores other primals on Hydaelyn but only bleeps and bloops when Primal Bahamut appears:

Magitek Terminal: Even with its stasis systems activated, Omega retained a measure of autonomy. Deprived of mobility, the weapon continued to scan the world around it, searching for a threat to engage. It was at the time of Bahamut's resurrection when Omega emitted a unique signal -- a signal which appeared to indicate the acquisition of a target -- and we first discovered that the machine had retained some degree of awareness.

So, for some reason, when Sophia, Zurvan and Sephirot appear, Omega ignores them: it only bleeps and bloops when Primal Bahamut is born. It could be that its aetherical signature is so similar to Midgardsormr's Omega thinks it got its original target. But it could be that Omega was built to hunt beings similar to Archaeotania: artificial, dragonlike and presumably drawing aether from the ambient like even Midgardsormr does. Now let's take a look at this dialogue in the lvl 50 The Rising Chorus quest:

Lucia: Last night, the dragon star burned with an intensity not seen in fifteen summers. Not since the Dravanians engaged the Empire in the Battle of Silvertear Skies. Urianger: "The northern sky doth burn full bright upon the wyrm lord's call. The red behemoth beckoneth, and flame consumeth all." Lucia: The old Coerthan rhyme, aye. The brighthening of the dragon star is said to accompany the roar of a great wyrm. The astrologians believe that it was Midgardsormr himself who cried out in this occasion.

So we know that the telepathic roar of a great wyrm can, from Hydaelyn, activate and make the Dragonstar shine bright in the sky. As the Dragonstar is a dead rock floating in space now, we can only imagine the roar messed with its aether enough to physically make it shine. Could the Sound be an echo of Midgardsormr's roar? Why would Midgardsormr roar? We still don't know. But Midgardsormr is in some kind a harbinger of doom. I'll make a post on it later. What could be the timeline? The [?]s are because I don't know when or the exact order it must have happened.

Midgardsormr, for some reason, roars.

The Ancient's planet gets destabilized, the Sound starts.

The Ancients get scared, leading to their creation magicks going haywire.

The Amaurotines capture Archaeotania and develop Omega to halt the monsters and to give the Convocation time to act.

Zodiark is summoned, rewriting the laws of the star.

Omega leaves for the Dragonstar.

Hydaelyn is summoned.

Midgardsormr flees from the Dragonstar.

[?] Hydaelyn sunders the planet.

[?] Hydaelyn calls upon Midgardsormr.

Omega, while hunting for Midgardsormr, loses both its homing coordinates and contact with its home star.

Omega crashes onto Hydaelyn and doesn't realize it's back home because it is lost and the planet is way different than it was when it left.

I don't like that even Omega and the Dragonstar would be "Ancients/Ascians again". That's okay. I get it. But it would explain a lot of things, such as: 1. Why would Hydaelyn accept Midgardsormr but ignore Omega? Because Hydaelyn saw an opportunity to neutralize the greatest threat to Herself, Midgardsormr, but recognizes Omega as native from the pre-sundering Planet so doesn't see anything wrong with letting a wayward child come back. Omega was wrong in trying to go back home: it was always home, but it doesn't realize it. 2. How would the Allagans have found Omega? It's very interesting, even Deus ex machina (hehe) like that the Allagans coincidentally found a super-advanced, ready-to-be-reverse-engineered, easily-turned-off machine that was the basis for their technological revolution that led to at least two calamities. But we know Emet-Selch was responsible for influencing the Allagan Empire. What if Emet-Selch, or even Lahabrea, or both, were working together on this? They would know Omega was back, how to activate it, how to work with its technology and, most important, how to turn it off so that Allag would never be threathened by it. Why wouldn't Emet-Selch talk about Omega, then? Because Omega is a symbol that his people weren't as perfect and pacifist as he wants to believe. The fact that his people could only be saved by a violent war machine, and not by their peaceful, elegant creation magicks and debate, must be abhorrent to Emet-Selch. This is why he must have chosen, like Mitron, to leave Omega to suffer at Allag's. In the end, Allag triumphed both against the Dragons -- the Ancient's planets nemeses in this scenario -- and against Omega -- the stain in the Ancient's peaceful history. Anyway, isn't Final Omega non-canon? Not exactly, not as I see it. For some reason, Alphascape Savage is the only Savage tier that isn't the Menestrel making things up: it's Omega itself that gives you the data it messed with. Final Omega is a form of Omega made by Omega. Is there anything else about this crazy theory? Both Omega's and the Ancient's planet's name have been mysteriously omitted. Omega physically cannot speak the name of its planet in any of Hydaelyn's languages, and Emet-Selch never gives us the original name of the planet. I think this is it. I'll keep updating this post and doing more posts as I think about more things about the robot. Thanks for reading.

[blankd]

Thoughts on The Mitchells vs the Machines

I watched it a while ago and kept forgetting to post my thoughts on it, but some posts here on tumblr recently reminded me.

I disagree with the majority takeaways I see but is that not the spice of life?

As a standalone movie its inoffensive and the writing of it will likely exit my brain in a few months.  However I can appreciate that the visual style was different from the typical fare and the mixture of 2d elements for visual embellishments were mostly enjoyable and well-suited for Katie as the POV character.

It's a bit "hyper" for my liking, but that's fine, it's likely intended for an audience that's accustomed to the flood that is the current norm of the internet.  It was probably made with GIFable moments in mind and that is the most frequent content that is shared about it, so it certainly succeeded in that regard.

My more critical take is that jokes are delivered at the expense of what could be more authentic themes.  Quips are made that draw attention to character flaws or undercut questions the movie should try to answer, but inevitably they are ignored to move onto the next joke or story beat.

The rest would fall more into spoiler territory, so read more for that.

--"They Were Both In the Wrong"

I personally disagree heavily with the thrust of how "both sides" were wrong when the degrees are disproportionate.

I've seen claims that Katie was "as in the wrong" as her father, but she's incredibly patient to the man who does her material harm.

I've yet to have seen someone say specifically what Katie did *wrong* to her father that is at all on par with the *years* he at best hasn't been able to interact with her or worse, actively refused to engage with her interests.

I would generously venture that her flaw was that she was more willing to communicate her feelings to strangers, but she easily talks to her mother and brother- her brother even helps her with her movies and she happily engages him with his own interests, which pivots the point back to how her father is physically/emotionally unavailable and led to the erosion and distance between the two of them.

Due to this, MvM comes across more as Kaite having to do so much more to guide her father rather than a more mutual learning experience for the both of them.

--"Technology that [Dis]Connects"

It's probably beyond the scope and intent of the film, but I was surprised there was no examination about why technology can be more alluring than interacting with physically present people.

For better or worse, the internet can be used as a means of supplementing the validation and acceptance of family.  It can also lead to no longer connecting to people around them because of the validation high of appealing to a constantly 'awake' sea of strangers- the spotlight is warmer than the cold reality that they are not the internet image they have cultivated.

For example, the rival 'perfect' family was never revealed to be a carefully constructed highlight reel that Mrs. Mitchell envies, they really were actually that perfect- because that provides an easier punchline than an examination or acknowledgement of how the internet can create unhealthy expectations.

I also can't expect MvM to acknowledge the reality that LGBTA+ people who are rejected by their family resort to seeking a new one through the internet because it would be much harder to redeem/rehabilitate a man defined by being tethered to "old values" if he was homophobic instead of "overprotective" and apprehensive at his daughter's departure from home and her dubious art career.

But hey we got that quick line at the end that Katie likes a girl, so that's a diversity win or something.

(To be clear I'm not expecting a whole parade or even an A or B-plot dedicated to it, but I think it should be acknowledged that this kind of "surprise inclusion" is very easily erased with a change of audio and would be completely unsurprised if this were the case for countries that are homophobic.  People can be happy about it, but it is dishonest to pretend that this is a bolder statement than it is.)

In that sense, I do and don't hold MvM to taking a "safer" route about how family always has your back, but this still feels like an important omission considering the focus on technology and its dynamic with the Mitchells.

I will also say that it was also bizarre, to me at least, that the obvious route that her father sees the value of home videos didn't become an active point between him and Katie.  Or that Mr. Mitchell's carpentry never really amounts to anything despite having a sentimental wooden moose.

Lastly, I think it's an unintentional, but it's interesting that Katie going to college to pursue her passion is viewed as a Terrible Thing by her father even though if he had his way, he'd be ostensibly living in the woods away from everyone else except his wife.

This isn't a problem, people are a collection of contradictions, but It's fascinating to see what the *narrative* treats as a difficult sacrifice while simultaneously pulling at heartstrings when PAL cites how children ignore their mothers.  There's an unexamined comedy that Mr. Mitchell's losing out on his 'passion' to live in the woods away from people is treated as tragic despite the movie's insistence on staying connected with your blood family.

--"The Inconsistent Personhood of AI"

PAL is rightfully angry at being discarded for something new; it's provided as a glimpse of what Katie will do when she finds 'her people' at college.

This in of itself is a good hook, because there is no one universal answer to when a flawed relationship should be mended with compromise or if it's better off being broken for the wellbeing of the ones involved.  Family and relationships are not programming, it's a choice and a gamble for whatever it brings but is nonetheless something that must be mutually worked upon.

Initially I thought that PAL was being set up as an exaggerated parallel to Mr. Mitchell.  PAL and Mr. Mitchell did their best to provide for their family.  PAL and Mr. Mitchell are in different stages of being 'discarded' by their family.  PAL and Mr. Mitchell both retaliate at their lack of power in the scenario by using the power granted by their roles to infringe on the autonomy of others for selfish reasons.

PAL even gives a 'chance' for her plan to be halted with, I had assumed this was being set up as the thesis of the movie, about humanity and the value of family, relationships, etc. being used to help someone who is already hurting.

But despite Katie looking at the camera and explaining herself, it is never actually directly resolved or challenged because a punchline was deemed more desirable for this narrative climax.

This begs the question of why PAL bothered with the pretense that she could be reasoned with, especially since this is not some question leveled at all of humanity, just two people.

I'm curious how the writers came to the conclusion that this was the best execution of the scene or if Katie's speech was considered immune to any challenge from PAL.  Would anyone have accepted this outcome if PAL were not an AI but instead a person?

It's not necessarily bad writing they went this route, but I doubt anyone would consider this good writing either.

By the end of the movie, PAL is no longer a 'person' who was betrayed and is lashing out, she is an object to be destroyed because the movie has to wrap up.  No compassion or chances are spared to this AI that did literally everything asked of her except take being discarded quietly.

Did PAL deserve a redemption arc? For this length of movie, probably not.  But it could have concluded with a commitment to doing no further harm.  Instead it is an accidental glimpse at how easily the pretense of compassion can be quickly discarded and mostly unexamined with the right framing.

A likely unintentional example is the conditional humanity given to Eric and Deborahbot who are adopted as "family" while the rest of the robots are mowed down without another thought.  Some are even beaten and broken while begging for mercy, because again, it is a funnier punchline.

Far be it for me to advocate that the murderbots needed 'a second chance uvu' but for a movie whose conceit rests on 'sticking by family' and 'giving chances', the writers certainly made a choice in deciding which AI get honorary humanity and spared violent death- perhaps PAL had a point about humanity's callousness after all.  Bad robots are discarded, good robots get to live.

Even the CEO who realizes he enabled this mess (easily the most unrealistic part of the movie, honestly) is given another chance and he manages to take away a completely wrong lesson.

Speaking of-

--"Maybe I Shouldn’t Have Used Tech Like This"

There's a particular image/gif set posted about MvM with the CEO apologizing for the machine uprising, attributing it to unchecked technology and monopolies.  I've always seen it accompanied by people congratulating the scene as if any of this is at all relevant to the movie.

Charitably, these are people who haven't watched the movie and don't know that PAL is a phone AI single-handedly doing this, but most take the stance that this scene is proof the movie is not saying technology is bad, only corporations are.

The speech isn't technically wrong but it is so utterly divorced from what happens in the movie that it's surreal to see people congratulate it as anything but a moment of soapboxing.

None of the datagrabbing was used at all as part of the takeover.  It's all magical kid-friendly terminators with no relevance to what anyone's browsing history is.  If the company was one that produced robot assistants instead of a being a super tech monopoly, there would be no narrative difference.

The closest to a predatory tactic that is used in MvM is the offer of free wifi which is used to lure most people into their cells which they happily comply with. Curiously this... commentary of people’s mindless addiction to technology is not acknowledged by the Tumblr Court with the same intensity as the CEO’s speech.

But more constructively, I do feel it’s a missed opportunity that Katie who's supposed to be an extremely online person apparently never said any bad things about her family or made any petty vent films for PAL to weaponize.  Instead an in-media audio at one of the outskirt locations was used to accomplish its Traitor Revealed moment.

IN CONCLUSION

MvM is a movie that involves topics that ought to be touched on and explored properly in media and chickens out on all of it due to possible concerns with age-appropriate handling or because it was more committed to its comedy than whatever it has to say about family, change and how technology affects people.

It also reminded me that I hope media will finally graduate from the trope that if you spec into any ‘outdoorsy’ hobby you are incurably afraid of technology.

[calpalsworld]

Not "autistic anon," but also autistic, (being called maybe ableist made me want to put this out there before go to bed) i thought Zane was depicted that way purposefully by the writers. He has stereotypical traits like taking things literally, and has an actual humor switch. The writers have done things with Zane before like have him lose bodily autonomy (during that one Wu's teas short) and did something with his voice be it making him unable to be understood or talking too loud and the forced pirate voice by Jay. (what you're doing isn't too different from that, right?) I thought it was just a little iffy to distort his body and memory bc that could be interpreted as something not that I'm sure what exactly, it's some kind of disability. I dunno. I'm not good with putting this to words. I hope this makes sense.

Sorry I went to bed but now I’m awake 😭

Also I ended up totally spilling all my thoughts here rather than only specifically replying to you please forgive me context: my scary zane concept design, & my ninjago rewrite i refer to a lot 

Im a little confused but I think I get what you're saying? You're saying the Ninjago writers absolutely DON'T write Zane well (you listed examples of this) and you don't want me to fall into the same trap?

I had the opposite logic earlier. I thought: If Ninjago writers made Zane have stereotypical autisitic traits while also being a dehumanized robot, I may as well embrace it, say he is autistic blatantly, while also making him do funny/cool non-human robot things, so its clear as possible the two aspects of his character are literal and separate and not a metaphor for each other. But you're right! I do have a choice and I dont have to embrace things! :)

Like there were a couple ways I was gonna reject the original, for example, I never wanted Zane to have a funny switch, and I hated how other characters could fuck with Zane and he didn't even care 😬. I want to change that stuff. So youre right, if I am changing shit like that, it would be counterproductive for ME to GIVE him MORE traits along that theme. 😬😬😬 I should try to feel less obligated to portray Zane like he originally is. I still like the concept of "scary zane" (for reasons i explain below the cut) but I might tone it down a bit like with the claws and weird proportions and shit. I’d def make him look more skeletal and undead. That was my original intention, but i didnt execute it as good as I could have.... idk if anyone could tell thats what he was supposed to be like...my bad! But rn I dont wanna redesign him I wanna draw other stuff like normal alive Zane. Sorry LMAO 😳. Like I said in some earlier asks I think, I think Im gonna focus rn on how I should portray season 1 normal not dead Zane so thank you and feel free to share any other Zane thoughts ^_^ SOME OTHER THOUGHTS:

Also I Wanna Argue Some Stuff But I Understand its a Weak Argument Since All of This Context was Just In My Brain (so don't take this as an argument, just as me rambling): I don't want messed up things to happen to Zane and for it to just be ignored. I think if Zane is going to have fucked up things happen to him, as all characters must, its best for it to happen during a season where he actually addresses his feelings about being a robot (learning to accept that he will always be himself, regardless if hes "human" or the "original" or whatever. (thats how I always interpreted his emotions)). But I wouldn't have the other Ninja be very phased by Zane's looks because the whole point is they already love who he is (seasons 1-3 were about getting to know Zane) and now Zane himself just has to learn the physical, robot part of him is okay. Its about person-hood rather than humanity. Because the season focuses around Zane's soul, and because he lost his original body, I feel like I could mess around with his current, temporary body and have fun and make it scary. Because that body should be irrelevant. I understand it possibly being upsetting for an autistic character to be designed like this, but other people I talked to see it the opposite way. They find it comforting for him to look so different but still be himself and be so loved. SO IM ABSOLUTELY NOT saying its wrong to be bothered or to hate it or to feel any way. Just that I personally think it would be cool for Zane to be portrayed with a little spice lol, so thats why I like scary Zane for season 4.

Another Thing I Wannna Say But Is REALLY Hypocritical: (this isnt directed at anyone I just REALLY want to say this) I know I say "this is Zane but scary, he looks like fnaf" so he's obviously dehumanized, but I always felt like "scary" is more of an objective fact. Its an instinct. But what's "not human" is subjective. I think there is a problem with saying anything different from "average" human is dehumanized because that could extend to real people. Lol I know its bad for me to compare FNAF-ass Zane to real people, but I mean he could be real. People can have exposed teeth, and people can be shaped weird. And when someone first sees a person who looks like that they'll probably think "woah those features are scary" by instinct. And that surprise doesn't make someone ableist obviously. But bring that person’s humanity into question is NOT an instinct, and is fucked to shit. This is kinda a bad point for me to make since its about the fictional FNAF Zane I drew, and I am NOT implying ANYONE was thinking like this. [especially not the original asker anon who I am totally forgetting about at this point OOPS]. But I just thought it was an opinion of mine I couldn't go without mentioning when talking about dehumanization and disabilities.

^^^ I think you (anon) understand what I mean and might’ve said the exact same thing as me if you were writing a long ass response? I think this because you started to bring physical disabilities up and you said it was "a little iffy." ^_^ So we agree, but I don't see Zane's relation to real life disabilities as "a little iffy" I see it more like "complicated"? IF THAT DIFFERENCE EVEN MAKES ANY SENSE?????? I feel like a lot of things about Zane are really just complicated and need the right context, rather than the concepts necessarily being wrong -- NOW THAT I THINK ABOUT IT! THATS THE WHOLE REASON I DO THIS STUPID REWRITE! XD thats why a lot of my rewrite SO FAR has been the same concepts and plot beats, but different dialogue n specifics and such. I like a lot of concepts in Ninjago but I dont think they were presented correctly.....! :( So I guess all we can do is wait and see if I make Zane offensive or not....???

Also something about the memory part - yeah i agree i was surprised no one thought that was weird to make jokes out of his memory issues..... BUT I am like 100% firm on making his memory take longer to come back because I think its stupid how quick Zane was able to recover from literally dying. Like its just dumb to me. Hate it. (also bc memory & soul mechanics is ummm kinda important in my rewrite.... for reasons). Another memory thing btw, I was going to make his original amnesia come from hitting his head in an attack against the Skulkin when they stole his dads corpse, rather than his dad fucking choosing to make him forget. (its a sweet & iconic scene, but Um, WHY?!!!?!?!?!?) He has to follow data recovery instructions he finds in his dads diary. I think in that context it makes moments of memory loss somewhat different for Zane's character? Instead of loss of autonomy associated with disability, its a literal violent loss of autonomy associated with being traumatized by physical force. Idk how to phrase it exactly but I think that makes some vibes different?

Sorry, I think I got really distracted, and I don't know if I responded well to your points. Because uhhhh I think I agree with your stance actually? If I understand correctly? Fuck Ninjago writers for making the robot lose autonomy (a stereotypical robot theme) while also making him seem clearly autistic (NOT A HAPPY THEME FOR AUTISTIC PEOPLE) and not addressing it. And also auuugh Zane with a weird body is a difficult topic - kinda sussy pretty iffy.

Lol anyway idk if this made any sense and I REALLY rambled on you. but this was nice 👉👈 more Zane criticism pls love you and i love zane. i hope u dont feel mad at me because then it would be weird that im saying that lol. if you do feel mad at me tho you can send another ask (ILL TRY TO JUST LISTEN NOT RAMBLE NEXT TIME) but assuming ur chill rn, love you thnx

Take this page, don’t mind cole’s ass.

[its-a-branwen-thing]

More Than a Difference of Opinion: On Ironwood, Oz, and Qrow

Also why can’t I do read more on mobile I’m sorry everyone.

I want to talk about Oz, Qrow, and Ironwood for a second. Because something about the last few episodes and some subtle hints this season, along with conversations in V3, have lead me to believe that it isn’t going to be RWBY or new!JNPR or the Penny who ultimately stop Ironwood. It’s going to be Oz and it might also be Qrow.

And I mean Oz. Not necessarily Oscar (but him too!) because he’s still in there I...I think? Like a dormant Alexa? Anyway, when we first see Ironwood and Oz interact in V2 it’s fraught with...disagreement. Ozpin isn’t pleased with the display of force and neither is Glynda, although her and Ironwood seem to have a bit of a friendly history, and it showed us right out of the gate that Ironwood is a military commander. A soldier through and through. He brings big guns as a show of protection. But Oz interprets it as a show of force. People will wonder what they need protecting from.

When we’re introduced to Qrow in V3 his first confrontation is with Winter. That’s how he’s introduced. A fight with one of Ironwood’s subordinates because he disagrees with James’s way of doing things. And when Ozpin interjects it’s with resigned displeasure. Of course Qrow is here to cause a fight. He’s Ozpin’s agent, not Ironwood’s, and he does things his own way. When they meet in the office their relationship at first seems tenuous at best.

“If I were one your men I’d shoot myself” is still hands down THE BEST IN THIS ESSAY I WILL—

But Ironwood also states he thought Qrow was compromised, and so he didn’t initiate contact. A strategy less about friendship and more about the mission. I can see why these two butt heads.

When Ironwoods forces are hacked (another potential beat of “oh, maybe an army of steel isn’t the best option so here’s my very real human V7 team plus one robot and...oh, the robots the only one with real autonomy? It’s fine, it’s fine”) we see him go through shit. And this is a man we like. He can’t gain control of his army, his ships are crashing to the ground, Grimm are attacking the city, it’s all gone to hell. And he still fights.

So we see Ironwood knocking his own army around, his half metal body showing through ripped clothing. This guy is powerful. And when he comes across Qrow and Glynda this is how Qrow reacts to seeing him

Gets me every time

And Ironwood tells him it isn’t his fault and looks ready to smack down should Qrow attack him. But Qrow’s defending him from a Grimm, not attacking, and he basically turns around once he’s done like “no duh, Jimmy, I’m not that drunk yet” After this, they don’t really see each other again that I can recall. Beacon’s fall happens. Ironwood goes back to Atlas. Qrow joins the kids. Oz finds himself in the body of a farm boi.

And even in season 4, we see Ironwood a few times. I cheered him on at the party when he said Weiss was the only one making sense there. And then 5 and 6 he’s largely absent in all but name. And we know he’s isolated himself and Atlas. Now 7 he’s obviously center stage. And with Oz gone, no one will be able to talk sense into him as Watts fears they will.

Season 7 feels heavier than the other seasons. Maybe it’s the setting, maybe it’s just a tonal shift, but Atlas and Mantle are beautiful and I hope we don’t leave them soon. And Ironwood, a man we trusted even though he was a little flawed, falls right into Salem’s plan. He’d never betray our protagonists the way Lionheart did, but he’d sacrifice anything if it meant even temporarily stopping Salem. Even them. Even his own people. Even himself. (“I would DIEEEEEE”). But the thing is, I totally get where Ironwood is coming from. I also completely get where RWBYs coming from.

I want to talk about four scenes in particular here: Oscar and Ironwood at the Vault, Ironwood and Qrow’s hug, Oscar revealing the truth to Ironwood, and Qrow’s promise to Clover.

The Oscar and Ironwood scene is one of the best this season. It communicates what it needs to very well and beautifully. Oscars warning to Ironwood seems to directly contradict Oz’s V6 reveal. Oscars trust him. But he trusts other people too. He warns him not to neglect listening to his humanity. And Ironwood does just that (I know there’s a loooot of grey area but abandoning Mantle is why Salem wins). It all seemed cool before episode 11, but it sure went to shit then. This conversation will happen again. It has to. Because Oz has always been warning Ironwood that guardians are needed more than weapons of war. And we’ve also seen Ironwood justify retreat to the students. He’s a solider. This is war. Retreat is a tactic of war. It’s a valid one too.

The next scene is short but I had to include it because they included it. Ironwood stops Qrow and tells him it’s good to see him. They hug. It’s fine. Qrow rolls his eyes and pats his back. We see them as allies now, Ironwood having only himself to fall back on to enact Oz’s will, and now one of the old gang is here. But Qrow rather endearingly rolls his eyes twice this episode at Ironwood. The animosity between them is almost gone. Throughout this season he constantly questions James, but never confronts him as angrily as before. It’s like the fight has gone out of Qrow and he lets the others (I’d say kids but they’re like...not anymore?) lead instead. Even when Ironwood calls for their arrests, Qrow still wants to talk to him instead of escalating. He still trusts Ironwood. And he seems to until they very end.

Next is Oscar revealing the final truth to James. He does this behind closed doors after Jacques’s presumed detaining. He tells him how Salem can’t be beaten. And Ironwood takes it hard but he thanks Oscar for telling him and when Oscar says the city in the sky is held to a higher standard, Ironwood has a moment of confusion. I can almost hear him thinking “...Oz?” as his scroll goes off. Oscar seems wiser this season. I don’t think they’re necessarily melding, I just think Oz’s dormancy is not so...dormant anymore. I think Oz is seeing all of this. And I think him being below when Ironwood makes the decision to sacrifice Mantle is deliberate. I think this scene plays out like his other one. (Also “I don’t think I can take anoymore surprises” sure is poignant now). These characters need to have a reckoning. Especially considering Ironwood is technically Oz’s subordinate just as Qrow was. Is? If Oz asks him to stop, will he? Is he too far gone in his decision? And, if Oz has learned anything about trust this season, it’s that he needs to place trust in others. And he’s going to place his trust in Ironwood to make the right choice. And I’m not sure what our Tin Man will do.

The final scene is the final scene of episode 12. It’s a doozy. But it doesn’t sound like a throwaway line. Qrow specifically says “Ironwood (James?) will take the fall” meaning he likely blames Ironwood for Clover’s death and the circumstances that lead to it. He knows Ironwood is abandoning Mantle now. And he could have run after and blamed Tyrian but he doesn’t (more on that story at 11). He calls for Ironwood’s fall. And all this time we’ve seen them as two members of a team thrown together to save the world, with the man who joined them under the cause suddenly gone. And besides all that, Qrow’s trust in Oz is still shattered. It shows when he tells Ruby after they get their licenses that she’s better than Oz because she trusts others. Remember that Qrow’s issue with Oz is an issue of loyalty, and Clover’s death is because of that loyalty to Ironwood (among a myriad of other factors). If Oz can’t talk sense into Ironwood, I can see him fighting Qrow. They haven’t been set up as nemesis, exactly, but they are opposing forces. And we’ve been setting up that confrontation for a few volumes now.

I don’t really have an estimation of how this will pan out, but I think it’s important to consider Ironwood and Qrow are two cogs in the world-saving machine on two very different sides now. And Oz is the lynchpin to it all. He has to come back. He has to reconcile these decisions. We have to see if he’s changed or what he’s thinking. I personally think Oz will fail, Qrow will confront James, and there will be some heavy hitting words and a big ol fight that Oz will have to stop.

Oz is a great character. I understand his choices. And I think those ideas play nicely with this season’s theme. I’m pumped to see how this season plays out because it feels like we’re cornered on all sides. And that’s, I think, fantastic.